My partner 47 diagnosed with advanced prostate cancer.

Thanks for an update Orvy. I am so pleased you’ve been out today! We went to look around a stately home and gardens. The weather was perfect, the home really interesting and the gardens stupendous!

I’ve tried to attach a pic to hopefully help you see that life does go on despite the PC . I hope it works and I hope it makes you smile. I was sitting in front of this just this very afternoon. the building in the background is an orangery - makes my own conservatory look a bit pathetic! 

it was so peaceful and PC did not come once into my brain:)

• Hi Orvy thank you for the update,  yes it takes a while for the diagnosis to sink in, and the the waiting on the tests/results etc, we have all been where you are, but believe me things will get better, We just try to live each day at a time and most days don't even think about PC.  George is going through a menopause at the moment, we have a little laugh about the hot flushes and him turning into Georgeina by Christmas, and we are off to Croatia in Sept so things are looking good.  I will keep you in my prayers and thoughts, be positive and strong

Hibbie

Hi Orvy.

Good morning, I am sorry to hear that you are still struggling & that your head is all over the place.

Yes Warwick Castle is lovely I was brought up/lived in Tiddington (Warwickshire) and went to school in Leamington/Stratford upon Avon.

Very lovely part of the country and I still have family living in and around Stratford upon Avon. But I am now living in Birmingham where I met my wife.

Yes "little wins" are great and I love them more nowadays as I do like to make the most of every day.

Prostate Worrier.

Hello Brian. My husband was 64 last year when diagnosed with Stage 4 prostate cancer. He did 7 weeks of radiation including one week for pelvic lymph nodes. The side effects are worrying. Poor sleep and back pain complicated by lower back degenerated disc. Stomach issues from gas generated by foods. I have him on fruit and vegie smoothies incorporating brocoli and kale to reduce gassy issues since he needs the greens. Also loss of muscles and strength and he has lost 20lbs since January. Advice is welcomed.

Good Afternoon Comfort_2024 

A warm welcome to the Macmillan Online Prostate Community although I am so sorry to find you here,

We all react to radiotherapy differently - some of us get away with little or no side effects - others take much longer to recover. You don't say when your husband completed his radiotherapy but my initial advice would be:

* For the back pain and lack of sleep - have a word with his GP.

* Wind / Stomach issues - here's a link to our help pages for this issue - https://www.macmillan.org.uk/cancer-information-and-support/treatment/types-of-treatment/radiotherapy/pelvic-radiotherapy/bowel-problems-after-pelvic-radiotherapy

* Muscle Strength - this will be connected to his diet and lack of exercise. Again here's the link to our help pages - https://www.macmillan.org.uk/cancer-information-and-support/treatment/types-of-treatment/radiotherapy/pelvic-radiotherapy/late-effects-of-pelvic-radiotherapy

To enable us to give you some more specific advice can you please update your husband's profile with some details of his journey so far. To do this on your home page go to the icon of the beach (top right) click on this - then "Profile" and then "Edit" once you have written something - please include his diagnosis - don't forger to save it. (you can read my profile by clicking on my name or avatar).

I do hope the above helps - please get back to me once you have updated his profile and I am sure we will be able to offer further help.

Best wishes - Brian.

Hello and welcome Comfort_2024 .

I am sorry to hear of your husband's problems and maybe can offer a couple of suggestions.

Loss of muscle and strength is a fairly common problem and the normal advice is to start regularly exercising and incorporating some resistance exercises. If your husband needs help with this then his doctor might be able to refer him for physiotherapy or to a local gym which can show him how to do the exercises properly. My husband has back issues after breaking it and he has great benefit from an osteopath who treats him holistically, not just for physiotherapy but also with relaxation techniques which have helped him sleep better.

With regards to the sleep, is it because he has to get up to go to the toilet, does he have problems getting to sleep or does he wake up and then have difficulty getting back to sleep? There are different remedies depending on the cause.

The radiotherapy can affect the bowels but also the gut may have gone out of balance so that your husband is not getting the nutrients from the food that he is eating. I am a great believer in adding Greek yoghurt to the diet as it can help reset the balance. Very often small changes to the diet can make a big difference and it might be an idea to ask to be referred to a dietician. This could also help with energy. There are also medications for wind.

More information from you might help us to give you better targeted information.

Please come back with any questions no matter what.

Thanks very much for the suggestions, always hope. I will research resistance training and try to have him incorporate what he can. He completed radiation therapy  Decemner 18 last year. I can also incorporate Greek yogurt easily. For gas, he finds that a mixture of fresh mint tea/gas relief tea/stomach tea as well as marshmallow and licorice tea, completely knocks the gas out. This means drinking this combo tea daily,  at least twice if necessary, as opposed to taking medicines for gas relief. He uses advil targeted relief cream or biofreeze, for the backache. He is trying to avoid prescribed meds, which may become addictive. Sleep is a serious issue because sometimes it is because of bathroom trips, other times, back pain. Other times, he feel hunger and gets up to eat something, after having a full dinner and falling asleep. I told him I suspect his stomach may not be absorbing the food he eats, maybe as a result of the overspray from the pelvic lymph node radiation, to the stomach. He is sometimes not hungry at dinnertime, but may feel hungry once he goes to bed. We added fruit and veggies smoothies daily and use soursop, which is in season now, as a base, or bananas. This helps him to get greens added to his diet. Again, any advice is welcome. 

Thanks very much for the advice, Millibob. My husband's RT ended December 18, 2023. He has a urologist visit next week and a GP visit in early September and will do blood labs by this weekend. I feel as ifvthe GP will be the one to help us the most, probably. He'll be seeing the Radiology Oncologist in mid-September to follow up on the labs. Another zoladex shot in early September. A lot of the stomach issues appear to be related to his diet. We try to incorporate as much plant based foods in our diet as possible. I have tried foods like mashed potatoes instead of rice, which digests easier, as well as homemade soups with chicken and vegies. I have even cooked soup in bulk and frozen soup meals to give myself a break from the constant cooking. I also try to bake bread for him, instead of store bought breads. Lettuce doesnt seem to generate gas, but he hates the smell of greens being cooked, so I add them to smoothies. I will update the profile so you can help further. Thanks for all of the details in your response. 

Hi again. I applaud you for everything you are doing for your husband and have a couple more suggestions and comments. I doubt that the radiotherapy would have 'overspill' to the stomach area as the stomach is in the upper abdomen whereas the prostate is in the lower abdomen and the margins used in radiotherapy cover a tight area around the target. The malabsorption, if it exists, is more likely to be due to something else which needs investigating by the professionals. Mint tea and licorice are good but if he is having hot flushes then also try sage tea or tablets. Don't forget that any supplements he might take should be cleared by the doctors before taking them.

Gluten can cause digestive problems - I found out about 3 years ago that I was gluten intolerant so maybe try substituting gluten free options. The advantage of this is that it reduces the intake of the more unhealthy options like cakes and biscuits which have added sugar which unhealthy gut bugs love to feed on. Oats are a good source of slow release carbohydrate which keeps you feeling full for longer.

Hormone therapy can push the body towards type 2 diabetes. Many doctors are unaware of this so make sure that you keep an eye on the glucose levels when your husband has his blood tests and that it includes the HbA1c test as well as the glucose tolerance test. Some of the symptoms you are describing can be associated with pre diabetes.

Try not to eat too late in the evening particularly if it is a large meal and encourage him to have a little light exercise afterwards to aid digestion, plus it will stop him from falling asleep and disrupting sleep patterns. Smaller, more frequent meals can help with digestive problems. Protein is needed to maintain muscle and this could be increased by adding linseed and Chia into the smoothies. Fluid intake, particularly caffeine, gassy or carbonated drinks, can exacerbate the nocturnal loo visits, as can drinking later in the evening. Water helps the body process food so make sure he is getting enough. The latest guidelines are the body weight x 0.03 e.g. 70kg x 0.03 = 2.1 litres. Kinoa instead of rice is another good way to add protein, minerals and fibre to the diet - it is important to wash it first or it will taste soapy and I add just a little bit of stock cube whilst cooking to give it a little bit of flavour.

Many people are afraid of becoming addicted to painkillers, however, if used properly then they can be of benefit not only to reduce pain but also to reduce the sleeping problems. My husband has had severe back pains for years and was taught how to manage it by attending a pain management course at the local hospital using both drugs, exercise and relaxation techniques. Just a thought - when was the last time you changed the mattress on the bed and is it still appropriate with your husbands back problems?

It sounds as if you are both trying to do things on your own but do ask for help from the professionals.

And finally, make sure you look after yourself both physically and mentally. Looking after our husbands can be stressful and you have had just as much of a shock as he has had with the cancer diagnosis so don't neglect your own needs.

Thank you everyone, it's been a tough couple of weeks for sure! My partner has a phone call booked on the 9th of September with urology, this is for the biopsy results that he had done last week. Hopefully we will know the grade and the treatment plan then. They may need more tests but that's not been decided yet. From what I can gather is that they will decide on that with MDT before the 9th. The CNS did reassure me not to panic though because he's already started treatment with the injections. We have planned more trips out this weekend and I'm off work next week with my little girl before she starts school. I'm also a bridesmaid on the 14th of next month so hopefully all of this will keep me busy. I am also going to start focusing on another 'C' dare I say it.....Christmas! and possibly put my focus into doing something to raise money in the new year. 

I am still terrified of what the future means for us, how long we can live a relatively normal life and will he respond to treatment? It's something that I hate the most being in limbo. Hopefully over the next month or so, things will settle and we will have some kind of future

Can I ask if anyone is taking any supplements? and recommend anything for hot flushes? someone mentioned sage? 

Thanks Orvy