Hello. My husband, 74, has been diagnosed with metastatic prostate cancer stage 3b.

Hi Alfie42A

Welcome to the forum. You will find someone that can tell you more about your treatment side effects with Docetaxel and the timings of treatment . But mean while I want to say Hi and also ask you about your other stats, PSA and Gleason score.  These are all helpful to get someone that is exactly on the same journey. I guess most of us here are also interested in any extras as this is how we learn more about the cancer and treatment available to our OH or person. My partner is 3TB at diagnosis and he is having a different drug which is similar (Abiraterone) with Zolodex and a steroid Presnisolone. It's just over a year since diagnosis and he is doing fine. So going by that I would say Yes! carry on as normal?( around appointments).

The side effects for my partner are mainly fatigue and hot sweats and also trouble sleeping sometimes, he has other problems more relating to PC and possibly from having RT in August, and that is needing to rush to the toilet and needing to get up several times in the night for a pee. If we were going on a long distance trip with his treatment plan the only thing I could see as a problem would be his worry of not being able to find a toilet. Of course everyone is different and others will let you know how they have been effected. 

I'm guessing this is all new to you? Has your husband just been diagnosed? I think we can all agree here that it's a very frightening and stressful time and so worrying as to whats going to happen, but please let me reassure you that things do fall into place and you do adjust quite quickly. Though your husband seems healthy he is unwell and he does need this treatment to keep him well. I understand how you feel about him being "poisoned" but there is no alternative to being treated at this stage and he will be a lot better in health with treatment than without it. You can have a few add ons, like taking Calcium and Vitamin D,( run that by your consultant ),but they usually suggest that for bone health.

Also, look into your travel insurance as there may be a problem with being fully covered, but it should be fine.

This is a friendly helpful place with plenty of people who will answer if they think they can help.

Best wishes to you and your husband

L

Hi Alfie42A.

Welcome to the forum. You will find a wealth of information and support here to help you through the journey. We can all empathize with the fear, shock, grief and anger that you feel when first diagnosed but this does change to acceptance after a while and you learn to live with a new norm. Everything seems to revolve around doctors appointments and treatments initially but then you get into the routine of monitoring it.

My husband has just completed his course of docetaxel chemotherapy. His initial reaction was that he didn't want it as he had first hand experience with a family member who had it many years ago and also his father had died of PCa in 1997 so when he was diagnosed in 2020 he thought that he didn't want to go through what had happened to them. Now he is glad that he has had it and it wasn't nearly as bad as he had thought it was going to be. The course of chemotherapy usually consists of 6 cycles at 3 weekly intervals so you are looking at 18 weeks. Some people sail through with very little side effects whilst others find that they are feeling grotty some time during the first week after the IV infusion and then have a good 3rd week. We tended to arrange to do things and give ourselves a treat every week 3. It is now 3 weeks since the last cycle and my husband is feeling really good.

I would say that the hormone therapy has a greater effect on him with fatigue being the worst to deal with but you learn to work round it. Maintaining Quality of Life is the goal of all the therapies and there have been so many advances in recent years that there is a lot more hope now than there was even 5 year's ago.

Trying to keep active is important but equally so is a positive attitude that you are going to beat the cancer into submission. The oncologist told us at the start that he could do 50% and the other 50% was down to us with a positive attitude and lifestyle changes.

Come back with as many questions as you like. As BarryW says if you can give some more stats then this can help in giving more tailored info to you.

All the best to you both. You will find that we are a friendly bunch who just try and help each other.

Hello Alfie42A 

I am so sorry to read your first post - however a warm welcome to our exclusive "Club". You are in the right place for help advice and a general chat. We are a decent bunch!!

To be honest there's not much I can add that my friends BW and Alwayshope haven't already said. I haven't gone down the Chemo route - I was lucky and had only HT/RT - if it helps any you can read my personal journey by clicking on the icon of the beach next to my name.

Prostate Cancer is a "couple's journey" and it's great that you are there for your husband - my personal view - carry on with your lives as much as you can - after taking into account any side effects from the HT/Chemo.

Feel free to ask any questions you may have - however trivial they may be - someone in the Community will have "been there - done that" and will be happy to help.

Best wishes to you both.

Brian.

he will be having 6 lots of chemo so thats 18  weeks of treatment 

if ur staying in this country u will be o.k but definitely not overseas 

quite a few people have unexpected side effects during chemo me included 

thankfully i was only in the lakes and not far from home 

everybody responds differently to chemo hope he's lucky and sails through 

Thank you very much, Barry.

I tried to posy earlier but I may not have!

His PSA was 11 but has already come down to 6.4 after the first injection.

His Gleason is  4 + 5 which sounds very scary!

Thank you very much.

I'm so glad I joined this forum.

And yes, I will ask plenty of questions!

Thank you, Brian!!

I think this has made our minds up - we will not be doing our long distance trip in February. We cannot get insurance and we don't know how he will be feeling.....grateful for the info!

Yes 4=5 is very scary as it's an aggressive cancer, but your PSA is very low so it sounds like it's caught before its gone too far. Millibob is a 9 and doing very well and I'm sure he will confirm this or read his profile by tapping on his name on his post .

L

Yes I am a member of the "Gleason 9" club. I consider myself a "lucky boy" as although it transpired I am a "9" and an aggressive cancer I started my cancer journey as I was in hospital as an "in patient" so I had my biopsy and was started on treatment at that point. With a PSA of 182 on diagnosis I hate to think where I would be if treatment had been delayed!! .