Hi everybody. I've just recently had a prostatectomy on the 30 of June. I'm still incontinent but my main problem and worry is that I'm impotent. Just had my first check up with the Surgeon and with Matt at Southampton hospital for erectile dysfunction. Must admit I broke down in tears when he was talk8ng to me about my options for the future of my chance of a sex life. I'm only 51 and was sexually active before the op. I just can't see how these pumps etc are going to make sex life return or how I'm going to be able to cope with my life feeling like this!. Please can any fellow brothers talk to me and help with any advice. Please
Hi Babamoo, sadly I am in the same situation as you and still trying to find a way to cope , on May 7th at the age of 56 my potency was taken away with the prosectomy and I wasn't ready for the mental impact on me. I have tried the sildenafin tablets to try and achieve an erection but no success yet, just got the prescription upped to 100mg, I am able to achieve an orgasm of sorts though not really satisfying. Maybe the pump will work I am having a conversation with urology on the 18th August and will raise the issue then.
I guess the fact that the cancer has been removed, psa clear so far ! Then I should take the view of being lucky it was detected early and my life goes on . Still real hard to get over it , I do find walking in the countryside helps to clear the mind and appreciate the beauty that surrounds us. Stay strong and be well.
Hi Graeme. Tried viagra myself but found out they couldn't save any nerves so all that is a waste of time. Broke down when the hospital were showing me the pump and telling me my choices. Yes they say we at least your alive! Am I? Is this living? I have so many things Go I g thru .y head at the moment Like maybe living a full life as a man for a few years is better than this for the rest of my life. Pumps that no the moment, pellets sow the japs eye that are only 60% and take hours to work!! It's been 6 weeks since my op and it's just starting to kick in mate. I'm scared, worried and fearful of how I'm going to cope mentally brother.. I have a wonderful, understanding partner but even so it's early days and she is only 42!. Is this life really worth what it's going to be? I'm not sure buddy. I'm trying to be strong and I send you strength and we'll wishes.
Hey Babamoo, I have been through the same thoughts and the truth is still do when I'm down , but the sexual relationship can continue with other means and a bit of imagination, giving her pleasure has helped me know that I'm still useful and I do enjoy pleasuring her. You say that your partner is understanding then it could be more you coming to terms with your situation and realising there is more to come in this life and you need to hold on to find it ! All the other stuff will settle down , my incontinence is so much less than 2 weeks ago and I'm on 2 pads a day now but still occasionally wet the bed depending on what I drink !! Life's a bitch but still find ways to enjoy one day at a time and walking and cycling has made a big difference to mindfulness and fitness.
Sorry to hear about your situation. 51 is obviously no age when it comes to ED problems.
were u not told about potential problems before surgery either thru the oncologist or on line info?
i know that its too late to look back in hindsight but I do have some good news that I read in the Daily Mail today.
There is a trial taking place at Guys hospital in London for people who are suffering from ED after surgery but were OK before. i think that u can apply thru your oncologist or GP.
The other thing is that your surgery was only a few weeks ago, possibly u should give it more time.
I didn't have surgery but hopefully others will come on and say that it took longer than 6 weeks for ED problems to go away. i would have thought at least 3 months.
Yes I was told Steve and yes it is still early days but after seeing my surgeon on Wednesday he told me they couldn't save any nerves at all so the chance of getting an erection with out the use of pumps or I sections is highly unlikely. Even so the realisation of no being able to get one no matter what was said or told is a different matter ie should I have gone the chemo route, should I have done nothing. I haven't seen the newspaper will try and find out about it. Thanks for you kind words. I had no choice really about having a full prostatectomy apart from chemo because my prostate was not only full of it(7 out of 10) but also had broken out. I live in hope that in 3 months time things will change but from what I've been told by the Doctor I don't live in hope. Best wishes Martin
Sorry Martin, I know it's no good going over old stuff but wondered why u had surgery if it had already broken out from the gland. However much cancer is in the gland Radiotherapy is normally offered once outside
Like I said when I was diagnosed they gave me 2 options only. Chemo or full prostatectomy. At that time it had not broken thru nor after all the scans spread but after my first check up after the op the Doctor told me that when they operated not only was it full of it 4+3 on both sides but it had just broke thru. Luckily it hadn't spread to my lymphs close by. As I said they removed all of it but couldn't save any nerves.
I don't understand what doesn't make sense? What doesn't make sense!! I was diagnosed with prostate cancer 4+3 in both sides. They offered mec2 choices! Radiotherapy or full robotic radical prostatectomy. After consulting both the general opinion from both doctors was that at my age full prostatectomy was best idea. Had radi so robotic prostatectomy. Went to see the doc for my first check up o Wednesday. Told me that they had removed it all and thier were no signs of it(cancer) left. He also told me that when they operated they also found that it had breached the wall so it's good that they got it all put and it had not affected my lymphs. What doesn't make sense Steve? Are you an expert on this? Have you had a prostatectomy? I'm sorry but your comment about it not making sense is baffling to me. Are you not reading my text correctly. Martin
Don’t despair yet Babamoo and others in the same position. I have just read this in today’s Daily Mail… ‘men that have had prostate cancer surgery could benefit from a new shock wave therapy’. The article explains that 10 weekly sessions of 10-15 minutes may cure the loss of sexual function. Participants are needed for British trial as well, for men aged 40-65. It says ‘anyone interested should contact their GP. Hope this helps….
