Prostatectomy- hints and tips

Dear all 

great relief to see there is an under 50’s threat 

I am devoted wife of 48 year old  just diagnosed. Stage T3a. Gleeson 7 (3+4) boarderline 8 (4+4) high cribriform seen and nerve invasion.  Luckily no metastasis. Such a shock. PSA of 12.5 picked up in routine gp blood test. No family history and first visit to GP in 15 years  

Radical prostatectomy next Thursday. 

Any practical hints or tips for first few weeks post surgery.  Do you need pads during first week or is that after catheter is removed.  I heard you shouldn’t even lift a kettle for first few weeks. How quickly did you feel like going for a walk to get fresh air? We’re you in a lot of pain? Is night shirt best (to avoid things pressing on tummy / wounds) or just pyjamas?

any tips from those who have had radical prostatectomy very welcome  

many thanks  


  • I had the da Vinci. Enough nerves were spared for me to function with a little help from the little blue pill. I sometimes also get erections without the viagra.

    Talk to somebody please.

  • You absolutely must speak to someone.

    The first thing I would say is that this surgery is generally not offered unless your surgeon is confident that the procedure will give you a really good chance of being cancer free.

    I’ve had the surgery, and 10 weeks on am dry and have returned to a full and active sex life, albeit with the help of the blue pill. The only difference is dry orgasms which feel slightly different but no less pleasurable.

    You will have some dark moments in the weeks and months ahead, but take the offer of surgery as a hugely positive sign.


  • Firstly thank you for your honesty. I have considered suicide from my first diagnosis. It was the fear of not being sexual competent. This has really really helped me. Thank you  

  • Hi

    i had my opp on the 8th December 2021.  I was with another guy who had his done that day too.  He went home the day after as happy as Larry.  I was born with one kidney which caused a couple of complications, so two weeks on I have a drain in my kidney and a stent, the drain comes out next week and the stent 6-8 weeks later.

    Now.  I have felt absolutely no pain from the start and I smile from ear to ear every single.  I have got to say that I am a whoos but if I had to make the choice again I would.

    Yes there are chances of side effects but NONE are guaranteed to affect you, in fact everyone I have spoken to have suffered none.

    I had the opportunity of different courses of treatment including just monitoring my prostate.  I am a great believer that if something in life isn’t right then get shut!

    last Tuesday I was having my stent put in.  I was in recovery ready to go back to the ward when someone called my name.  It was a guy I have done work for for years, he had cancer elsewhere, which was diagnosed too late to save him, he passed away this Tuesday.

    From start to finish the NHS have been wonderful.

    I pray that you all have a peaceful Christmas.


  • Thanks LD. yes as Christmas approaches i can’t say I’m excited. I think the talks you have prior are petrifying. Ok question? When the catheter is taken out I have a very long journey home! I am doing the exercises but are you incontinent as in free flowing 

  • Hi TC

    I still have my kidney drain in, I have got an appointment to take it out next Friday.  If it’s pain that you are fearing please don’t.  Mine was/is managed with paracetamol when I feel that I might need it, the medics won’t let you feel pain.  I can’t tell you the elation that I felt when I opened my eyes after the opp.  I do suffer from bouts of anxiety and have been taking sertraline for a couple of years.  Have a quiet look at your life, try to find the positives (not easy sometimes I know).

    You are a human and humans have fears.  Everyone I’ve spoken to who have had the procedure all said to me get it done.

    My advice is don’t hold back on voicing any fears that you have.  Health professionals are duty bound to make you aware of worse case scenarios, none of them said to me this opp may kill you, and yes that was one fear that I had.  I had a few others, one was that I’d wake up with a purple head (they tilt you slightly back) the nurse in the Anaesthetic room said “you daft bugger where did you get that from”. I think she meant I wouldn’t have.

    I have got two married daughters and a two year old granddaughter, I want to see that little girl grow.

    I went the surgery route with absolute determination.  Was I apprehensive course I was.  You can do this TC. 

    I will pray for you my friend.


  • Hi Baz yes prayer works! I will cover you in prayer as the tube is removed. My fear is not being in control of my bladder. Yes I have three grandchildren and I love them so much. It’s a scary journey Bless you Baz

  • Hi TC

    I have managed got two messages mixed up. You have still got your sense of humour lol that tickled me.  I’ll grab a prayer brolly just in case.  I can’t speak from knowledge yet but common belief is that people cope pretty well with pads, I got that from a fellow prostatectomy patient.

    As soon as I get my catheter out I will pop a few lines on here of the experience.

    It is a scary journey, but it’s doable, the battle is won in your head.  You will be fine.  

    Take care TC, all the very best to you and your family.


  • Train Crash

    When the catheter is taken out I have a very long journey home! I am doing the exercises but are you incontinent as in free flowing 

    I hated my catheter. Couldn't wait to get it out.

    On removal I was given loads of liquids to check that the system was still working. I had to stop until the nurses were happy. Visit to the toilet. Bladder scan. Not empty but empty enough.

    On the way home the waterworks exploded and I had to piss myself in the back of my wife's car. Arched back. Pain. But fantastic relief. It was projectile vomiting rather than dribbling down the chin.

    I was afraid that my first visit to the pub would result in all the beer just trickling through willy-nilly. But it didn't and I was so pleased.

    Maybe take some blankets or a bucket.

    To the hospital not the pub. Don't make the mistake I made.

    Happy Christmas.

  • That’s what’s scaring me as I’m 50 miles from the hospital. I just don’t want that to happen. Did the exercises not work to stop the flow