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Tbmocha, sorry your father has had a PCa diagnosis.  It is a very scary time but once the dust settles things will get better.  It would help if you could let us know more about the diagnosis.  Gleason score and T numbers which will help others give you great advice.

Just react as you feel.  Hard to believe but your dad will probably be more worried about you than his diagnosis!  I know my thoughts were about my family and how I would tell them and how they would react.  My family have just been there for me, listening and helping if I needed it.  I know I have their support.
if it helps, I was diagnosed with advanced PCa over 6 years ago and I am still here.  Best wishes,  David

Hello tbmocha  A warm welcome to the online Prostate cancer Community. I know you don't want to be here but it's the best place for help and advice.

First off - my friend eddiel in his post is correct with the fact 98% of men with Prostate Cancer die WITH it not OF it.

If it's Advanced Prostate Cancer then it's left the gland and spread to other parts of the body so no, an operation is out BUT treatment is available - as you say Hormone Therapy - Radiotherapy and Chemotherapy to manage the cancer. Attached please find a link to a cracking information booklet you can download from Prostate Cancer UK regarding Advanced Prostate Cancer:

https://shop.prostatecanceruk.org/our-publications/all-publications/advanced-prostate-cancer

Once you have read that, please come back to us with any questions - nothing is too trivial.

"How do you react". Speaking as a father of 4 I and my wife were fully open with our children and they have been there for us when needed. We have carried on with life as normal and from the start this basta*d wasn't going to win. Just be there for him and I hope he will confide in you if he needs anything. 

There are side effects to all treatments - and he need to keep as fit as possible - but a positive attitude is also half the battle.

To help us help you - if you get chance can you please update your fathers profile with his diagnosis (Gleason Score -  TNM staging and PSA) this helps us help you by not asking questions all the time - you can do this on your home page by clicking on the image of the chair (top right) then "profile" and then "edit". (You can read my profile by clicking on my name or avatar).

I do hope this helps - please come back to us with any questions.

Kind Regards - Brian.

Hello and welcome. Many of us have been where you are now so understand how you are feeling. Once the shock wears off and your dad starts tests and has a treatment plan then things will feel easier for you. Support him by showing him lots of love, being there if he wants to talk and giving him privacy if he wants that. Make sure you get support for yourself as well, have you got a friend you could talk to? There is always the McMillan support line to ring and if you are really struggling see your GP. We are all here for you 

A warm welcome and you have come to the right place for help and support, both for your dad but also for you. As Shar says, show him love but also carry on as normal as possible. There are times when he may need help with ferrying about whilst he is having treatment and to make sure that he has a well balanced diet, and is fed regularly. Please ask any questions if you want information on treatments, diet, where to get additional support - anything.

Hi tbmocha,

You are in the right place to get help and support. At the moment it is hard to believe but when treatment start life will almost be normal again. My husband diagnosed last November and we felt all these horrible emotions you describing. The oncologists took over and they will tell him what to do. He is very lucky to have you to support him. I can help with two suggestions:

Keep your father active. The hormones will make him fatigue and to combat that the best is to be physical active.

The other thing is, stick with this community here. The members are all going through the same thing and they are all so generous with there advise and time. They are also more experience.

Lots of love

Danfa

hey sorry about ur news 

be positive for your dad that what he needs most surround him with positivity !

don't treat him any different than before , if he's like me i don't like fuss and people feeling sorry for me !

exercise is good walking/swimming etc the treatment will cause fatigue 

its not a death sentence it can be managed,  i'm into my sixth year now still working 

it will be tough thats where all the positivity will help