Chemotherapy not worth it

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Good morning

I was diagnosed with locally advanced pancreatic cancer I January 

I saw the oncologist who told me anything was palliative.

He said you can just walk away and get the best quality of life  you can  in the next few months

Or you could try gemcitarbine only which could/will land you straight in hospital very poorly as I have a chest condition

He said I could try it and be watched very closely

After 1 session my white cells plunged to only just over the level where chemo can be given. I have felt just awful since the first chemo. Brain fog. Ghastly weariness. I cannot go near children or people noemw as I am at risk of severe infection and sepsis

I want to stop this chemo and try to enjoy what I have left without this awful brain fog

Husband doesn't want me to give up!

Oh dear

May I ask how other people sort this out

  • Hello

    This is a difficult situation based on the wish of your husband that you 'do not give up'. I can understand why he says this but it is your cancer and your life. As you say the chemo is palliative rather than curative. I think you need to tell your husband how you feel about this and that you do not wish to have any further chemo. In the end you make the decision but it would be good to have him on your side. There is a very good book by a Glasgow GP called Margaret McCartney called Living with Dying . It you can get a hold of a copy - available on Amazon - it might be helpful to you both.

    Squeaky

  • Hi Md16 Sorry to read this . I had chemo and was admitted to hospital with a white cell issue and was put in a room until my count changed and I wasn't able to have the full 6 chemo just 4 . I think you have to make your own decision as you're the one going through the hell . All the Best Regards Minmax 

  • Thank you minimax

    I know the consultant did tell me that the chemo could "land me straight in hospital"

    Now I appreciate  what he meant.  It has been literally hell all week, knowing the chest infection wasn't improving with oral antibiotics and checking my temperature twice a day.

    I will have my white cells checked  tomorrow to see what I need now. I can't go through this again

  • Hi, my mum had pancreatic cancer she had no treatment because it was to advance and when we asked the doctors how long extra does it give her said could be 3 months and she new she would be in hospital for those 3 more months and that's not to life at all. So she chose nothing because there wasnt much hope left for her. She had a bit of a life left to live before she was to ill we went to bingo, shopping we watched TV we talked we put things in place nothing was left unsaid she wasn't ill stuck in hospital and then she passed away in her bed at home with me right there. It was the best decision for her and us . I don't fully know your story or what they have told you regarding your treatment so I can't make a decision for you however I just wanted to tell you her experience and I hope it just gives you something to think about as it isn't giving up at all it's acceptance with incurable cancer and once you understand that you can still live for the time you have left stuck in hospital ill is a day where you could be out making memories. It's wasn't easy I can't tell you that but with distinct nurses help to pain relief we made it work. I'm so sorry that your going through this and like my mother you sound as brave as she was I was so proud of her. I hope this message gives you some comfort. 

    All my love Heart

  • Hi

    Thank you so much for your realistic and supportive  reply

    I know that decision is best. I have already wasted 2 weeks as I  have barely been out of bed.

    My tumour is locally advanced and any treatment I am told is palliative

    I would like to be able to take my family and grandchildren on holiday. It will have to be in the UK now but it would be special

  • You do it. You do what is best for you all now and those memories will mean the absolute world to you all. I know you husband is scared because when you say no more treatment if sounds like your giving up but your not your taking control of a situation that has taken over your life and doing what you want with your life instead of being ruled by cancer and treatment it doesn't mean your giving up your not and I'm sure if you reassure this with your husband and family they will understand. I wish you all the best and I hope you have some beautiful memories with your family