My mum 55 has been diagnosed with high grade serous carcinoma, its been such a fast month one day im finishing work to being in hospital after I finish to be the only one with my mum to be diagnosed we thought she had a collapsed lung not cancer. I've took time of work to be the support along with my dad but I am really struggling with the diagnosis. Mum has started chemo but they are now worried about her kidneys, mum has a permanent drain in place an thankfully with the chemo the fluod has dried up weve went from 850ml of fluid every 2 days to 300 to 0 mums first double chemo was on Wednesday last week thats a positive??? I feel so selfish and don't know who to talk to about it as its my mum going through it not me. I've got some ptsd from losing my daughter to leukemia i just need someone to confinde in.
Hi Luna cee
Welcome to the Ovarian group.
I am really sorry to hear of you Mum's diagnosis of high grade serous ovarian cancer.
I am also sorry to hear of your daughter's cancer. it must be very difficult to have someone else close to you have a diagnosis. I hope that you are getting support for your PTSD.
My own cancer was a high grade womb/endometrial cancer and I also had chemo. I understand how hard it is to have someone close to you having such a diagnosis and it is normal to feel like everything has happened so fast. It can all feel a bit of a whirlwind- especially when the diagnosis was unexpected.
We do have a Support Line that is available everyday from 8am-8pm and they are lovely on there so if you do feel like you are struggling and a chat would help then do pick up the phone.
It can feel scary to hear words like high grade and serous but I found it helpful to try and think that it is really just a description of the cells and how they may behave. It is also helpful for the doctors in targeting the most effective treatment for Mum. With any high grade cancer they do tend to do some more aggressive treatment.
Chemo is not easy at times but it is doable, especially with family to support. Everyone can react differently to chemo and there are different regimes so the best advice I could give is just for Mum to go with the flow and to contact her hospital (she should have a 24 hour helpline) if she is concerned. Mum should also have a CNS that she can contact with any worries. At my hospital I could leave phone messages or email and she would then get back to me.
I can understand your concern regarding Mum's kidneys and the fluid but they will monitor Mum regularly with bloods etc and hopefully get on top of it. You say about Mum having a double chemo- mine was carboplatin and paclitaxel and I know that this is often used for endometrial/ ovarian cancers.
It is fine to share how you feel on here and it is a safe space to do so. You are not being selfish and it does not matter whether it is you or Mum- you are both still being affected by cancer. If you felt able to call the Support Line , they can have a look in your local area to see what is available there. Some people for eg have a Maggies Centre near them and they can be brilliant.
We do have another forum that might be worth looking at as it is for Family and Friends of someone who has cancer.
(+) Family and friends of people with cancer forum | Macmillan Online Community
The carer's forum is also a supportive place.
(+) Cancer carers forum | Macmillan Online Community
For any medical questions- you can either give the Support Line a call and talk to one of the nurses or we do have an ask the expert section. Am just mentioning it as you were asking about the fluid drain
(+) Ask a Nurse | Get answers about cancer | Macmillan Online Community
Hope this helps a bit and we are here when you need us.
I wish Mum well with her chemo and hope that she responds well to it.
Jane
Hi,
It must feel frustrating that Mum had been going to her GP with symptoms but was not diagnosed more quickly.
Her treatment plan sounds a normal one- to have some chemo which will work whole body wise and then a scan to check on how its gone. It then sounds like they will hopefully operate to remove the visible cancer and then have further chemo to mop up any stray cells.
I am sure Mum will be well looked after when she has her radiation tracer done. I know when I had my own appointments, there were so many and I didn't expect anyone to be able to attend them all. Mum will understand that her Grandchildren will need to get to school etc. And you will be able to catch up with her after she is back home.
Just knowing that someone is there for her will help Mum. But you need to also make sure you have plenty of support yourself. I know from my own experience cancer doesn't just affect the person, it affects everyone around them.
Its a shame that the Maggies centre is not closer. Mum's CNS may be able to suggest alternatives.
I did a search for you on West Lothian and the following came up. Even if you do not want to use them at the moment it is good to know where you can go if you need to.
Macmillan services in West Lothian - West Lothian Council
Find local cancer support services | Macmillan Cancer Support
I hope Mum's appointment goes ok for her and we are here if you need us.
Jane
