My Dad, who is 74, has recently received a diagnosis for oral cancer. The growth was spotted by his dentist in 2021, a biopsy in early 2022 showed the growth was pre-cancerous but unfortunately the hospital forgot to tell him. Roll forward to January 2023 and his dentist noticed a significant change in the growth and referred him for an urgent maxiofacial appointment. The consultant took one look at the growth and said it was very highly likely cancer. He sent my dad for an urgent biopsy, MRI and CT scan.
The results of the biopsy were inconclusive due to the cut of the sample used by the pathologist. There’s definitely dysplasia and apparent pockets of invasion.
The consultant explained that due to my Dad’s history (used to smoke but gave up at 40), loose teeth (above the growth), visual appearance and an indication on the CT scan of early/slight bone erosion (even though dentist’s x-ray showed no bone erosion) that the biopsy results together with everything pointed towards a cancerous growth, but it’s not conclusive.
The reason that this is important is because my poor Dad has to undergo the same surgery as though he’s been diagnosed with aggressive oral cancer “just to be on the safe side”. Meaning 14+ hours in surgery, lower jaw bone removed and replaced with a titanium plate and a bone from his leg. He will have his lymph nodes removed from his neck and a skin graft from his leg onto his neck. He will be in intensive care for 24 hours and HDU for a few days. A feeding tube will be in place for two weeks and possibly a tracheotomy. He will be in hospital for a minimum of two weeks and recovering for months. He is absolutely terrified about the surgery and the recovery. Watching him suffer like this is horrendous for him and for my Mum and I to watch. Trying to tell him not to worry is worthless because he’s beside himself. He’s also very angry and upset that this could have all been treated with a laser if the 2022 biopsy had been followed up instead of being over looked.
Can anyone out there offer any experience of this or similar surgery? How did you cope?
I know he’s not alone and that there are so many of you out there who’ve had to encounter and face unbearable situations to fight for your lives. How do I help him stay focused on the future?
Thank you for reading and good luck with your own personal journey x
Hi OC23 and a very warm welcome to the online community which I hope you'll find is both an informative and supportive place to be.
I'm sorry to read how much your dad and the whole family have been through and it's normal that you have many questions. I can see that you've already found and joined the head and neck cancer group and that would be the ideal place to post this question as it'll give you the opportunity to connect with others who have had the same operation as is being proposed for your dad.
Clicking on the link I've created will take you straight there where you can start a new post in the same way as you did this one.
Wishing you and your dad all the best
x
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