Feedback on surgery with 7% morbidity!?

Hi Shebu, I think we all have an innate attitude to risks and benefits. Sometimes we run towards something, and sometimes we are motivated by running away from something and I bet if you are already 80% decided that you’ve already weighed things up. Possibly the thoughts of living well with cancer versus living the longest that we can with cancer.

When I’m not sure of a decision flipping a coin can help, not to determine what you actually must do in the end but to work out how you feel about one decision over the other. A friend on this forum  who unfortunately is no longer with us, used to suggest closing your eyes and picking a right and left option and seeing which way with your eyes closed you sway towards. I poo pooed that one, but she was a great advocate of living as long as you can incase there’s a new and better treatment coming around the corner, and when there’s not having the satisfaction that you gave everything a fair shot. 

When I’m faced with treatment decisions, I like to think through all options, often there’s no right or wrong decision, just the best decision that helps you achieve what you are aiming for. So sometimes the question to medics or ourselves is what will likely happen if I don’t have this surgery, and what is likely if I do. A decision is only right at the time it’s made so if something bad happens later it doesn’t mean the decision was wrong just that circumstances or information changed. I hope you become comfortable with your decision. I know your a member of the living with incurable cancer group, I’m wondering what their take on things is? 

Thanks for the suggestions KT. I read Dalonis profile, it was apparent like you said she gave everything a go and so sorry for your loss.

I think I still want the surgery but still nervous about it. I'll post in the incurable group to see what response I get.

Hi Shebu- You are so brave! Many of us will have to make decisions like yours. Here is what popped into my mind: If you are unfamiliar with caring for a stoma, ask to see a stoma nurse  or another expert to explain what the care is. A person has to be vigilant in making sure the surrounding skin stays intact. At the very least, your significant others need to know how to care for the stoma if you can't.