Out my depth

Hi Luke,

It was numbers of years ago that my dad was diagnosed with terminal stomach cancer. He was almost 60. It was a huge shock! The medical profession said he had up to 6 months. Although we had not been close I made every effort to see him when ever I could. We built a very special relationship during his last months, discussing many things that we had never talked about before. I was so lucky I had that opportunity. 
It was not an easy time physically for my dad but he was surprisingly very calm. We didn’t talk about his cancer after her first told me. We just made the best of the time we had left. He gave up chemo because it made him feel sick. He ate just what he fancied. He had a daily visit from a nurse who gave him his morphine. He died at home. 
I hope in sharing some of my feelings, I may have helped you a little

All the best xx

Hi Luke7 I am sorry to hear about your dad. It is terrifying when we hear that a loved one has cancer, especially with such a prognosis. It can be hard to open up, well done for taking the first step and posting here. 

Can I suggest you also join the Supporting someone with incurable cancer forum  where you can connect with other people in a similar situation to yourself. You can also call the Macmillan support line who are available 7 days a week from 8am until 8pm on 0808 808 00 00. 

Thank you for reaching out strangely enough weve always been close but this has made us talk more openly rather than hold things in so i really appreciate what you have said thank you x

Thank you i appreciate your time and reply i dont know what i was expecting from coming on here but that is exactly the reason why i did. Means alot and thank you for the info x

Hi Luke7, it is good sometimes to talk to other people who have or are going through the same experience as yourself and your father as sometimes it is difficult for people who haven't to understand.

Best wishes to you and your father.

Hi Luke, I find myself in a similar position as you. My dad was given 6 months a week ago! He has lung cancer as well. I feel I have joined a club I didn't want to be in to be honest. It has been devastating news as I am really close to him. The sadness is overwhelming at times but I am getting used to the news slowly. 

We are now looking at what we can do as a family to make happy memories together while he is still able to. I suppose one positive is we have some time to spend together. Thinking of you, your not alone.

Thank you for reaching out and indeed this is definitely a club that none of us wanted to join that said im glad i did as there are truly some amazing people on here that have made me smile so thank you and thinking of you too 

Ali J67 said:

We are now looking at what we can do as a family to make happy memories together while he is still able to.

I think this is so important.  The disease itself, and even treatment, are largely outside your control, but the memories you make are an opportunity to take back a measure of control.

That's so true Lolie, we are making plans for while he is well enough to enjoy them