Feeling alone

My mum started her chemo today. She has NSCLC (a very large tumor in her right lung that cannot be surgically removed) 

Honestly the chemo couldn’t have gone better…. She was made to feel very relaxed, had a giggle with the staff and enjoyed a nice lunch while there. No pain at all, and if anything she enjoyed her day. So far this evening she’s felt ok too. 
Maybe she’s hiding it from me but she’s really living in the moment. She only thinks about what’s in front of her that day. She tells me to ‘take it as it comes’ but I’m a worry wart and naturally am very scared of what’s ahead and think about it all constantly. I know it’s going to get harder as she goes through things. 

Im so sorry you are struggling, it must be so hard. You are young and a strong woman having raised 5 kids! You will get through this!! 

Your mother sounds like a strong brave lady. I'm more like u and I'm a worrier its constant I even wake up scared of the day for some reason. My first dose is Tuesday and bless my 19 yr old is going with me. We dont really get along as she will take advantage of me not feeling well to do things I dont approve of in my home knowing I want have the strength or fight to deal with her..so that concerns me. Everything concerns me. My family are believers so half of Texas is praying for me.. I hate not having a partner/ bf/husband whatever u want to call him.. I've been separated 8 yrs now almost 9. He lives around the corner but we dont talk really cause I'm still angry at him I think .. but anyways I will keep you and your mother in my prayers. Take care.. I'm a bit of a stress head and worrier but I'll listen if ya need to talk..

That’s good she’s supporting you on Tuesday even though you don’t normally get along! She might not be allowed in when you get the chemo… I left and popped back giving my mum a pret and cake half way through, but had to leave again.

you feel alone but like you said you have a lot of people praying and thinking of you… even if that is far away you are clearly loved. 
try and stay positive and take each day at a time. 

thank you, very kind for you to offer to listen when you are going through such a hard time yourself. 

x

I'm good at listening.  I'm having trouble finding anything else I'm good at .. it's hard to stay postive but I have to try cause theres no other choice.. monday I have a pre chemo appointment I'll find out then if she can. None of us drive so she cant pop back. I hope u find today an easy day..

Update today still feeling alone and scared I try so hard to think positively but as I sit here with no one who wants to hang around with me. So I'm just here all alone. 5 kids and not one has time dor me so I dont have to be scared and alone. I know it's not their job but I could use one of them for some company. Am lost and dont know what to do.. yall take care today

Please she think you are alone,  I will listen to you.

My husband is pre chemo too, it is a scary time.

Take to your nurses, they are there to support you xx

I havent met my nurses yet I go monday for my pre chemo appointment then start my chemo Tuesday. I am very scared and feel alone. I talk to family and i pray but at the end of the day I'm single and have 2 teens living with me I never see unless it for food ..so I am always in my own head arguing and trying to get out of my head is hard.. thank you for listening 

Hi Frazzled do you have a Maggies centre or a Macmillan centre near you? These are usually located near to the hospital. This would be a really great place for you to go just to chat and have a cup tea, they are very welcoming x 

As I dont drive and nearest bus stop a few minutes away and I'm to afraid of ending up sick I start my chemo Tuesday . I dont really know if there is or not I think someone said theres one in our hospital but that's eaither by bus or spendy taxi.. so I dont know. I've used the support line this week and called GP hopefully uping my antidepressants will work idk.. I feel a bit dumb saying I'm scared.. I always wanted to beable to sit at home and do nothing and now that I'm stuck doing it I dont want to anymore..

I understand you are feeling scared, and that is completely normal! You are wise to be cautious about infection with chemo starting. 

Cancer changes our lives in so many ways. Our old lives are lost, and we have to adjust to our new way of living.  If you are no longer working, that is a huge adjustment for a healthy person, let alone someone undergoing treatment. 

I am glad you have reached out to your GP and the support line. When you start your treatment next week you will meet lots of new people. You will see the same people each time in the chemo unit, as the patients tend to have their treatments at the same time. 

I hope it all goes well for you on Tuesday. We will all be thinking of you x