Just me

Hi Frazzled

I had been wondering how you were getting on. Recovering from a big surgery is not easy and it is not surprising that it has taken it out of you physically and emotionally. It has been good that you have had some time to recover at your daughter's house and it is natural to feel anxious about going home. Maybe you can still arrange with your daughter that you can spend some time during the day at hers once you are home. When recovering from my own surgery I was glad to sometimes be able to get out of the house for a change of scene for a bit. It might be the best option- that you are back in your own home but can go to your daughters if you feel like you need a break from the 18 yo. 

It must be a nice feeling though to know that you are well enough to go back to your own home and back in your own bed and own surroundings. And it looks like its going to be warm next week so good to be able to sit out in the garden perhaps. 

I am glad that you have found the Macmillan buddies helpful and I can understand that you are worrying about them stopping but please remember the Support Line is always there from 8am-8pm so there is always someone you can speak to. 

Jane

My daughter says I'll see her after I go home but I want it's like she forgets about me sometimes its 3 or 4 weeks before I hear from her. I dont feel well enough to go home but I need to so she can have her life back. I'm really feeling down about it all.. I wish it was all over but nope it's not and I dont feel like it ever will be.. I'm just feeling very down at the minute.. way down..

If you are not feeling well enough, maybe you need to speak to her about it. Maybe she would be happy with a couple of more weeks to give you a bit more time? 

Have you got friends that would be able to pop in and see you once you get home?

I can understand that you are feeling low about it all. Have you spoken with anyone else about how you are feeling? Maybe consider giving the Support Line a call and find out what support is available in your area and ask about whether the Macmillan Buddies are able to continue for a while longer? There is also some free counselling that Macmillan/Bupa can help with if you feel it would be helpful. 

I just know in my heart their ready for their home back. So I'll go home next week. Hopefully the 18 yr old will move out like she said she was as I dont have the strength to argue with her about who is head of house hold.. I love her but we just dont get along.. bupa says I've had enough counseling and hopefully McMillan buddies will give me someone to talk to although I was comfortable with the person I was talking to but apparently your not supposed to get attachments or something.  I call it being comfortable with whom ur talking to. But anyways..I'll be ok I have no choice

Hi brandies, how are you ? Iv not looked on forum last few days, x

I'm home have been sense Tuesday. Daughter started feeling real sick on Wednesday and did a covid test today it said negative so that's good. I took one to be safe it said negative.   I'm feeling down. My room here at home is smallest in house with no TV so been sleeping on couch it's all made me feel so down . I heard from surgeon the other night and I'll need chemo and radiotherapy as the tumor was a 6 centimeter one and cancerous. He called to give me the name of next doc.. I'm scared. I hate living back home it's made me feel like I dont want to be here at all.. on another note the 19 yr old is still holding her job down so that's good.. but I suppose things are going good.. I just dont want to be here and cant find a reason to want to..

Iv been trying to reply to your last post but it saying its under review, so sorry to hear that you need further treatment, when will this be starting x

So sorry to hear that,  has it beencanyveasier with the youngest since u got home? X

I dont know as the surgeon just called to tell me to be expecting the letter for the appointment with the doctor that will be handling it. I wonder why it's under review.. I just want to be done and feel ok. I'm sad and cant find a reason to be honest..I just want my time here done.. cause I guess cause I feel I should be doing things ya know as an adult should and frankly i just want to scream...

Hi Frazzled and Bobbyjay- don't worry about the under review post- sometimes a single word can trigger it. One of the moderators will check it and put it back on. One of mine did a couple of days ago. 

Am sorry to hear that you need some further treatment- I had both chemo and then radiotherapy. Was a bit of a shock as wasn't really expecting it. Normally chemo has to start once you are healed from the surgery- so for me that was 6 weeks post surgery. They will get you in for an appointment before then to go through it all and then mine started about a week later.