Mum's Diagnosis

 JenniM25eec4 I’m so sorry to read you post, I can’t offer any help, but would like to you lots of love and wish mum health and happiness going forward.

much love Tili 

Hi I’m so sorry you were unable to go to her appointment but already you have a call with I presume one of the McMillan specialist nurses. They will be able to answer any questions they’re amazing if they can’t they’ll find an answer and get back to you. On the comment about hospital stays and not being picked up it’s very hard to spot that nasty cancer. I was told for weeks I had muscle strain in my back and had no cough but ended up being lung cancer and a 14cm mass in my back and affected lymph nodes. Sometimes the symptoms are too vague. 
I hope you get some answers I’ll be sending positive thoughts to you. 

Hope you get the answers to your questions.so sorry you got this news over the phone make a list of questions you would like answers to .send you both hugs and love 

Hi JenniM25eec4  welcome to the group but I am so sorry to hear about your mum. 
Sometimes things are said and the person saying those does not realise the impact of them. Your mum is still undergoing tests, so this nurse should never of said those words, that you now cannot forget. Let me just say that I have a family member at the moment, who at the beginning of the year was diagnosed with lung cancer, and was told he had 3 months to live. Well he decided he wanted a Christmas party, in June, so he did, all the family came and celebrated Christmas with him on a very hot June day. Well he’s just had another scan, and his cancer is still unchanged, on no treatment at all. So he is having his 2nd Christmas party this year. 
Having cancer is scary, and as mum has heart issues as well then yes it is very worrying for you. But please do not give up hope that mum will be with you for some time yet, and enjoy every moment together. Forget the through away comment the nurse made, because she would have forgotten it herself. 

Hello, firstly i am so sorry this is happening to your mum and your family, i can fully empathise. Officially, and to diagnose which type of cancer and the stage, they should do a biopsy, look up the 30 day diagnosis pathway, there may be a good reason why they have not, but i would definately ask, if they can do it without however, and give you good reason, take it, because the biopsy is not pleasant to say the least.  In terms of the blood test, it takes so long because they are checking to see which particular enzymes and hormones are driving the tumour, so they know if any targetted treatments will work and how well, if at all, immunotherapy would work. Finally, i truly believe, from my own experience with my mum, and from working in elderly care for many years, no one can say how long anyone has, maybe a very rough ball park, but thats it, and one thing i have learned along this awful journey with my mum is that you really have to take things one day at a time.  I hope you get some answers, if you dont, ask someone else until you do, i have found that not only do you have to battle the cancer, but you have to battle for everything else as well, and i really wish you and your mum all the very best x

Thank you for your response, was really appreciated! 

I had a call with the clinical nurse - she's now been referred to Palliative care team, which I hope includes a MacMillian specialist nurse - I've asked a few questions via email already and they've been incredible. 

Thank you for this Chelle - was really nice to feel a little bit hopeful after reading this!

I spoke to the clinical nurse who told me "months" - although they can't be more definite or give a range until they get the results of her blood tests back. They aren't going a biopsy, as they say there is no need, but the blood tests should be able to tell whether any palliative treatments are possible, so we'll see! 

Mum is strong, but it's just a case of keeping her spirits up so she doesn't give up entirely. 

Thanks again for responding!

Thank you - it really does feel like a battle! 

They haven't done a biopsy, nor are they going to do one as they feel it's too much of a risk. They have now gone back to the scans, and "discovered" it's also gone to her bone. It's just so hard to trust the people at the same hospital where they missed everything! but I will try my best, and I will absolutely fight with everything I have for Mum to have every opportunity or option she can. 

Thank you so much for your response x

I to, on paperwork, am down as palliative care but not in my bones (as far as I know) the treatments are hard going and maybe for your mums sake they think it’ll be way too much. Do you feel like you have a clear picture of how things are for your mum if not please ask them to explain again it’s important that you understand. I’m so sorry things have not gone smoothly for you where cancer is concerned there never seems to be anything straightforward!!!! Sending you both so many hugs and PMA.