Hi I'm still coming to terms

Maybe tell us a bit more about where you’re at Micky? I assume you’re past the treatment stage from what you say. 

Hi Micky. I see this is your first post so welcome

Tell us a bit more about yourself.

Post treatment we are all catapulted into surviving on our own without the constant attention we have been used to. It can all be daunting. Treatment itself galvanises the mind to pull the body through as well and suddenly the routine is gone...there's nothing.

Have a look at this article by psychologist Dr Peter Harvey. It resonates with all of us survivors and is very pertinent especially in the early days

Have a read then come back and we can all chat about how you are feeling. It does help. Lots of us have felt exactly the same 

After The Treatment Finishes

I'm three years out of treatment and believe me there were plenty of times I thought I'd never survive. Anxiety over recurrence is normal. It lessens and it becomes easier to live with to the point that it's ignored in the background.

Best wishes

Hi Micky,

I think we end up with some form of PTSD after treatment!  You find a lump ( or however you know something is wrong ) start on the path of getting it sorted and it's a whirlwind of scans, appointments and treatment from there, until you get spat out at the other end wondering what on earth just happened!  I took up the offer of 6 free counselling sessions from Macmillan and they helped somewhat.  

To worry about it again is very normal, it can definitely trigger health anxiety.  It's the realisation that things can really go wrong. Is it long since you finished treatment?

Yes treatment is done, I had a 9 hour opp then 37 radiotherapy treatments and 7 chemo over a 7 week period it was so hard but found it harder watching my family trying to do what they could for me, I was no my knees and felt so helpless 

Don’t fret over your family. I always say to people, “ imagine the shoe is on the other foot. Your partner is Ill and it’s you looking after them. You would be there for them wouldn’t you? 

Hi Micky 

So sorry you are feeling like this, I can understand how you feel. It is normal  as I have gone through this and so do many of us  here.  We do understand.  You have had your treatments and you have been through so much. Now you are left with the physical and emotional distress and feeling exhausted, and probably think what  next and how to cope with all this. Cancer leaves us feeling awful and drained.  We can feel guilty unnecessarily, We think about our loved ones and what we have put them through. They are watching us and are having their own issues, but cherish that we are here with them, hold on to this. Time is a great healer and can help us come to terms with things. In time you will feel better. It is still the early days of  you starting your recovery  and I know uncertainty can dominate things but hold on. Reach out to the people who know what you are going through as they will really understand. Maybe you can talk to someone on the Mcmillan line too as well as us and your loved ones. The more support the better.

Best wishes 

Nicky

It's been about 18 months from it stopped but because of where I had it my movement is very restricted in my neck and there's a lot of scar tissue which is very lumpy so I don't know what is what sometimes 

Probably a combination of scar tissue and fluid build up. Have you spoken about your worries at any of your follow up appointments? 

Hi Micky. I know it’s hard to get treatment but press your team for some rehab and physio. Maybe your GP can recommend a private practitioner to at least get you started