I am struggling with bad thoughts

Oh sweetheart..... All this is normal and is indeed anxiety. I recognise every symptom personally and I'm now more than five years clear of treatment. The fear of recurrence or metastasis is vast at the beginning. It can be hugely overwhelming and you lose trust in your own body. The paucity of decent follow up just exacerbates it. You're not getting monitored as frequently and knowing how busy departments are you're reluctant to push for care. 

I signpost people to Peter Harvey's article HERE a lot and it might help.

It might be worth seeing your GP for something to help you sleep. Macmillan offer six sessions of counselling free, look HERE Is there a Maggie's near you? They offer great support. Pop in. and have a chat with them.

I can say that these fears are real but they do lessen over time, I promise

Hi Lanclassie

Even at 14 months post treatment I still have iffy days, sore mouth and throat, tinnitus, chemo fog etc...it goes with the treatment, we cancer survivors have low moods occasionally, but if they come too often we must seek help, do not suffer in silence...mentally or physically...Please call Macmillan, your CNS or your GP ASAP.

Keep posting on here.... plenty of sound advice and support available from those who have walked in you shoes.

Take care 

Peter

Dani

I am really thankful for your reply and I feel so low today...sure will cheer up as day goes on - but rain expected up here in my part Wales.

Where in Wales are you? I'm in Ceredigion between Lampeter and the coast. Horrid out there just now......dark but brightening up later. Even the dog's taken a look outside and said no!

In the north with health board in special measures yet again - a bit windy here but a bit brightness towards sea looking out across to Abergele.  Yep my dog has decided to have a second nap...wish I could nod off like him

Husband, Stan,  and I are at Conwy Honey fair on 12th September (Google)

Come and say hello. It would be lovely to say hi.

I might just do that - love Conwy - best butchers plus little french bakery and honey very tempting.

Hi Lanclassie, there is no need to apologize, we are all here to listen to each other's worries and help where we can. I completely understand how you feel, after what the treatment puts us through, takes a lot of getting your head around, then when we finally do get to sit and think about what has just happened it brings on all kinds of thoughts and worries. I'm over 6 1/2 years post treatment now, with ups and downs along the way, and even now I can still get myself into a bit a state over nothing, it's just natural to worry. Hopefully you will have your mind put to rest today. Let us know how you get on.

Ray

Lanclassie said:

best butchers

Edwards.....always take something home

And Parisella's ice cream........

Hi Lancaster. The others have covered everything never feel alone there always someone here in daytime hours I’m usually around until 2300 ish. At clinic tell them and get gp to give you mild sleeping pills. Please go see Dani her honey’s wonderful. Know Abergele we used to drive through in our hill climbing days say hi to Yr Wydffa.if clouds break through from me. 

hugs Hazel