I’m at the end of my tether.

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My partner, Stuart, has an nj tube and a tracheostomy. Both as a result of cancer. The first from an oesophagectomy in November 24 and hasn’t been able to swallow safely since. The latter from a reoccurrence of the cancer causing vocal cord palsy. I fully support him and maybe too much. He’s miserable and seems to forget he’s in the middle of chemotherapy. He desperately needs support. We have the excellent Maggie Centre which I’ve started to use but I need him to go there too. To be honest I struggle to get through to him. I can’t believe the difference in him within the space of 15 months. Thanks for reading this.?

Hi Galloway, I’m Tony one of the Community Champions, I have had OS cancer and live with a Laryngectomy, which is a stoma in my neck to replace my Adams apple and voicebox removal, it’s a shame the throat surgery didn’t fix your partner’s swallowing, I can also appreciate his possible frustration which in turn is leading to bad tempers and him taking it out on yourself, I have to admit at times I also have too much to contend with due to daily routines that need doing and at times are even worse with say having a chest infection and the consequences results in the stoma.

I’m glad you have joined Maggies and sure there are others there with similar problems, the other service/support you or your Partner could try is the MacMillan Buddy Service, they will give your or him weekly phone calls to chat, not necessarily about cancer but your interests or more, the other things perhaps also post on the Carers forum and you may find others that are experiencing the same problem

Carers Forum

https://community.macmillan.org.uk/cancer_experiences/carers-only-forum

Buddy Service

https://www.macmillan.org.uk/cancer-information-and-support/get-help/emotional-help/macmillan-buddies?_gl=1*zr6ctz*_gcl_au*NzU2NjIxMDA5LjE3Njg0OTU2NzMuMTYzNTAxMjk0My4xNzczNTg0MDQxLjE3NzM1ODQwNDE.*_ga*N2NhZTM0ZjEtYzIyNC00MTU3LWIwM2UtMjFjMDkyN2M3ZjFi*_ga_2J203BPENT*czE3NzM1ODI5ODAkbzEwNiRnMSR0MTc3MzU4NDA0NCRqNTckbDAkaDA.*_fplc*SHVUN1J0TTNCRHFHVzNIckdBbTdKZzE1QnVzdjNUczB3MTFyRjNyaUNsR2Q3dmNJY0VrRjVaTFFNSktrYUY5UXhqcFBFdUxjazRJWHZkbWtqZmtFQmVTbG42REdqQ1FqN0xlTlExRXJSbkZLQkhZWkRIbmxZTmZpdVRNSzN3JTNEJTNE

Hopefully things may improve with time and his treatment finishes, take care,

Tony

We will move mountains to help people with cancer live life as fully as they can.
We'll do whatever it takes. For information, support or just someone to talk to,

call 0808 808 00 00 or visit www.macmillan.org.uk

Onwards and Upwards

Voicebox Cancer- Laryngectomy 2020 and Oesophagus survivor 2022

Adminitrative Assistant at Frimley Park Hospital, Cancer Support Hub

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I’m at the end of my tether.