Another new member of the club…..

Hi Pat,

I am so sorry that you have received this devastating news. I’m not surprised you can’t sleep. I’m sure I wouldn’t be able to either but maybe your doctor can prescribe you something to help. Has anyone discussed the possibility of immunotherapy with you? Why does your consultant not think that chemo might help? All I can say is to spend as much time as you can surrounded by the people you love and create some nice memories for them. Best wishes CB

Hi Pat

I think it's too much to process information like that without being disheartened. However I would say that we are all individuals and our journeys are all different. What information have you been given regarding your TNM status. The T represents the size of the tumours, N is for if any lymph nodes are affected and M represents if and where there are any secondary tumours. I know through experience on this wonderful forum that there are many others given a bad initial prognosis who are still around and living useful lives many years later so please don't think there is nothing more to be done. Is there anyone around you that can act as your advocate as quite honestly you're in no position to be dealing with this on your own. Once again this is something this incredible Macmillan organisation can help you with.

Please ask anything and everything as there's always someone on this forum to give you sage advice.

Wishing you all the very best

Anthony 

Thanks so much Anthony, I think as a man, this is the first time I’ve felt so incredibly vulnerable and small. Although I’m still affectively in limbo, your words have made me feel some hope. My better half is and will be my strongest advocate. I’ve had very little written data back if any, so not sure what the TNM status is. We’re meeting up with the GP to go through this in more detail hopefully in the next couple of days. I’ll update when I know more, thank you once again for the advice

Thanks for the reply, I’ve just been talking with the team today, they are meeting tomorrow to discuss all results and potentially advice on options, nurse is currently not offering the likelihood of any other treatment apart from palliative chemo, so will have to wait until tomorrow for the full brief

Hi Pat, I am so sorry to hear this, what a bombshell to be told that this is your only option it’s hardly surprising you can’t sleep, speak to your doctors and see if they can prescribe some think to help  

Being strong is not a bad thing it shows you care enough to be thinking of others, go make some memories for your family and enjoy what time you have left. 

Beat wishes Clive. 

Hello Pat,

I'm sorry that you've received this terrible death sentence too. My husband was told that he had only 5-6 months without treatment, 18-24 with palliative chemo. He was asked if he was willing to take part in a clinical trial, if his cancer type was suitable and he, of course, agreed. The biopsy results ruled him out of immunotherapy in the UK but the results were different in the US, where the research centre is. So, he was able to access immunotherapy because he's in the trial. His next CT scan is on 11th, after 4 rounds of treatment. He's worried about what this may show but the oncologist advised that the result usually reflects how the patient feels. Apart from fatigue and a few niggling side effects, he feels great. He can eat what he wants, no reflux, blockage or regurgitation, and has gained a bit of weight. He hadn't lost so much that he was underweight and is a bit disappointed because he'd been wanting to lose weight for a few years. 

So, the point of me telling you all this is to help you hold on to hope. At this early stage for you, it is so important. Earlier on, when we were at that stage, we had a period of mania, including a drunken kitchen disco with our girls and putting together a funeral playlist. It coincided with 2 couples we are quite close to losing a son unexpectedly, one 23, who was at school with our daughters, and the other 35. The younger daughter also has a work colleague whose 14 year old son drowned at a Summer camp in Italy. These tragedies helped us get things into perspective because we, at least, have time to prepare and we've made it to our sixties.

Early on, when walking the dog, my husband asked what's the point? He now thinks that every single day he has with us and just being alive is the point.

Hold on in there,

Lorraine

Hi Lorraine,

Thanks for the follow up. There are some great people in my family who’ve heard the jungle drums about my diagnosis and are already looking at options such as what you’ve mentioned for your husband. One of my nieces is a research scientist at Astra Zeneca and she’s looking at options to support whatever Oncology suggest, I am lucky to have these lovely people around me as well as being able to have support from this great forum.

Tash, my niece, is doing all this while getting ready to give birth to her first born next week! She’s a real treasure.

I understand from the nurse yesterday, that there is a further 2 weeks approx to wait until they receive the biopsy result of which cancer they are dealing with, so can only be patient until this is communicated.

i sat down with both my kids yesterday afternoon and we all cried, got some of the fears out on the table, told them how proud I was of them both and that I would fight this disease to the end. It felt better….

My better half Ang picked up some tablets yesterday to help get a better night sleep, I slept ok, so today’s feeling more rested.

it’s my birthday this weekend, hit the grand old age of 60. Ang has been plotting something, so looking forward to just switching off from this situation and just having some us time.

I’m glad I joined this forum, it’s great to chat with people who are going through the exact same experience, thank you for giving some hope back and giving me a chance to offload my thoughts.

Signing off now, take care Pat

HAPPY 60th, Pat. Have a ball! 

Welcome to the 60 club Pat! I was diagnosed with cancer just five days before mine, it certainly was the most unwelcome present I've ever received!! 

Thanks Bob! As you said, Great present from nature, that’s it, you’ve hit 60, that’s your lot!