New diagnosis

Hi Emma and a very warm welcome to the online community

I'm very sorry to hear that you've just been diagnosed with cervical cancer and it's no surprise to hear that you feel that your life has been turned upside down.

Have you been assigned a cancer nurse specialist (CNS) yet? If so she should be able to answer your question about storing your eggs. If not then you could either ask this question in ask a nurse, and one of the specialist nurses will reply within 2 working days, or call the support line on 0808 808 0000 and speak to one of the cancer information nurses. It's free to call and they're available every day between 8am and 8pm.

x

Thank you... I don't have a CNS yet. I've been called for a CT scan tomorrow. I found that I wanted to get the scan done soon but once I got the appointment I just felt anxious and down. I also went to a Macmillan Wellbeing Centre at my local hospital. It's a great place with lots of info, friendly staff and lots of tea! However again I felt pretty rough afterwards. I know I need to confront reality as it will help me process but it's so hard and as my mum is with me I do worry about her seeing me upset. 

Hi

Going through periods of feeling rough is perfectly normal as you come to terms with your diagnosis but most people find they feel much better once they know what the treatment plan is.

All the best for tomorrow 

x

Hi Emma 

I too received my diagnosis on the 12th feb . 

I don’t have any advice but I wanted to say hi , and let you know your not alone . 

im waiting for my scan results (had ct , mri on sat ) which I’ll get next Thursday . 

I feel all over the place one min strong and positive the next low and angry and confused . 

take care 

xx

Hi Stacemarie, 

Thanks for saying hi, how are you doing with it all? I had a CT scan yesterday and have an appointment with the gynaecological oncology team next Weds. I find myself wanting to get things sorted and then feeling anxious and upset when I get appointments through because it makes it so real. I'm also struggling with seeing my parents and sister get upset.

I'm watching a lot of Netflix to try and take my mind off things but it's an ever present knowledge in the back of my mind and quite frankly it's exhausting. 

Sending love x 

Hi Emma 

I feel the same it doesn’t feel real and then it hits you doesn’t it , I’m hoping once I have my treatment plan in place I’ll feel more in control of what’s happening if that makes sense ? At the moment I feel in limbo . 
It’s hard seeing your family upset I understand that I feel that I’m giving this awful news to my family and upsetting them I feel that I need to apologise all the time for bringing this upset upon them . 
let me know how weds goes , I’m here in the mean time too . 
sending hugs 

x

I feel in limbo too, yeah, and feel that knowing what the treatment plan is will help as there will be less unknown to some extent. But then I think I'll have to deal with going through the actual treatment so there's no actual let up. It's like you know life is never quite going to be the same again but you don't want it all to be different.

Let me know how Thurs goes too, it's nice (if that's the right word) to know there's someone who gets it and is in a similar place along this mad journey. Xx 

Hi , I just wondered how you are now ? 
x

Hi Stacemarie, I was thinking about you on Thursday as I knew you were having your results.  I can see from your other posts that you're having a radical hysterectomy on Weds - it sounds really swift but the good thing must be that it's early enough for them to use surgery as treatment.  Having said this I know people suggesting there are any so called silver linings isn't really helpful when you're feeling terrified of what's coming.  You'll be in my thoughts; you're not going to wake up during surgery.  When you do come around, go steady steady steady.  From everything I've read so far people say that the psychological side of things takes a while to get used to and process, I've figured I'm going to have to get used to the fact I'm going to be coming to terms with things for quite some time.

At my appointment last Weds I had confirmation that the CT scan shows no spread but I need an MRI (19th March) to determine size of tumour and whether my pelvic lymph nodes are enlarged.  I'm currently stage 1b1 which I've been told is the cut off for surgery i.e. if it's bigger I'll be having chemoradiation.  I spent so much time thinking about the possibility of a hysterectomy that I didn't consider chemoradiation at all so it's been a bit rough starting to read information about that.  As I don't have any children but would like to in future I've also got the "is there time to harvest eggs" question as well - I'll have a follow up appointment on 25th for the results of the MRI and I should find out then what treatment my consultant recommends and if there is indeed time to do anything about fertility.

You're going to have major surgery so focus on yourself and on healing - come back to the forum as and when you're ready but know that you're being held in mind. x 

Hi Emma 

apologies for the slow reply . How are you you doing ? 
well I had my op on Wednesday , came home Sunday . 
It  wasn’t as bad as I’d imagined , I’d prepared myself well I think with lots of deep breathing and calming music whilst I waited to be taken down . 
I did suddenly panic whilst being prepped before going through the doors to theatre but my csn was amazing and help my hand and talked me through until I was asleep . Next thing I know is waking up in recovery . 

my op wasn’t straight forward due to other issues  it was very long , I went down at 1230 and was awake at 630 and then spent a night in intensive care before transferred to the ward the next day . 
Consultant removed womb ovaries tubes lymph nodes cervix top of vagina and some surrounding tissue , I expected to be in agony but I’m coping well with pain relief . 
now just waiting to get the test results to see if further treatment is needed but I’m hopeful. 
ive been having crazy dreams since the op which I’m guessing is something to do with the annesthetic .  
I’ll  be thinking of you on the 19th , and if you want to chat I’m here . 
xxx