Imposter syndrome

Hi and sorry you find yourself here.

Of course you are not a fraud!!

 This site is wonderfully supportive and I’m so glad you have avoided chemo.

I initially was down for lumpectomy and radiation but things changed as they can from initial meetings.

 Onwards and upwards and sending you a big hug!! X

Of course you're not a fraud. After being told I was unlikely to need chemo, I was devastated when that changed; I start chemo on Friday and I'm still trying to loosen the knot in my stomach. I'm delighted you escaped that. Take the win

Take care and hope chemo treatments go well.

Barbara

I completely get this! Had surgery, hasn’t spread to lymph nodes and was initially told I’d just need radiotherapy but now need chemo but still feel like I should be back at work and feeling ‘lucky’

Sending a big hug, I get it x

Hi, I definitely get this, I feel the same at times.

I've the same as you, grade 2, er+ her2-, no spread so lumpectomy, SLNB, radiotherapy and now tamoxifen. 

I'm very aware that there are much tougher treatment paths and sometimes I feel like I don't belong or have a right to say I'm fighting this as physically I've not been through as much as many people. I'm relieved to have avoided chemo as part of my treatment, but there are times when I think I'd want it so I can throw everything there is at this thing to stop it from coming back again. I know it doesn't work like that and trust my team, but I'm sure you know what I mean. 

I don't use any cancer centres or go to groups and events as I don't feel I belong or warrant it, but do feel I want to feel a part of the community as you all get it, hence dropping in here.Treatment aside, I feel we're all in a similar boat with our own mental health, dealing with diagnosis and all of the waits for results and each treatment bringing up worries and concerns over the unknown. And going forward, the fear of recurrence. 

I will say, I haven't found fellow fighters to be anything other than supportive. It's more other people who look at me, looking ok on the surface, that feed into this imposter syndrome. Yet we know we have been through a lot, so you're not a fraud at all. I get it, I think we need to give ourselves a break. 

The most difficult aspect of breast cancer treatment hasn’t been the surgeries, chemo, radiotherapy, letrozole or Abemaciclib but the anxiety of recurrence and E149 unfortunately you are in that club. Apart from a short haircut I look the same but the person pre breast cancer has gone. I am now living with anxiety I can only express in this forum as you all understand it.

Any diagnosis of breast cancer no matter the degree is distressing.  You’ve been through the same things as many of us so no need to feel a fraud.  You are still on that journey and will be monitored in some way for the next two years.  There’s no such thing as a fraudulent cancer victim in my book.  I wish you well in your recovery and best wishes for the future x 

Hello E149,  I do understand that you feel grateful you didn’t need more aggressive treatments but a breast cancer diagnosis is stressful no matter if you have an early stage cancer or low chance of reoccurrence.  
My situation was a little different as I had DCIS in one breast and stage 1 invasive in the other.  Only a 3mm tumor for invasive but still needed bilateral lumpectomies and radiation and hormone blockers so treatment was the same as if the tumor had been larger.  I was very grateful that I was an older woman as I see how difficult it is for younger women who have to deal with breast cancer.  Also my cancer was not aggressive.  But to be honest I was depressed and devastated about it and lost weight etc.  I would have thought I would be able to deal with it better but I had a hard time.  Now that I look back I hope that I can give some insight to those who have had to walk this path.  Hugs and listening are sometimes the best I can offer so please accept that from me .

You are not a fraud and just one of the many who want to be survivors.  We can do it .

Barbara

You had cancer, you’re not a fraud. I had chemo and I’m happy for you that you avoided it, it’s not a competition. We all have different journeys and experiences but we are all here to support each other. 

I feel much the same  and also ER+ HER2- did have 2 ops as didn’t have clear margins. Will find out tomorrow if chemo is also required with radiotherapy. On good days I feel like a fraud and feel guilty I’m not at work but do think mental health is as important and I know I’m not mentally fit for work. Physically although feel Ok sometimes I’m just not ready to go back