just diagnosed and so scared


I've just been diagnosed with invasive ductal cancer grade 3 triple negative I'm so scared is anyone going through the same? 

  • Yes. I too was diagnosed with Grade 3, tripple negative. That was back in December of last year. There are others here with the same diagnosis, and we are all listening if you want to talk more. Is it ok with you if I ask some questions? You can say No, and you choose how much or how little you want to share here. Hugs for now.

  • Yes of course I'm happy for guidance and advice, at the minute my mind is in overdrive and making myself ill through worrying 

  • Ok. I'll start off by saying that what worked for me may or may not work for someone else, so I'll just tell you what I did, and you decide if any of it is useful at all for the way you like doing things. The first thing I did was to start a list of questions to ask my oncologist. When doing online research I made sure that any website I was looking at for research data either belonged to a university or a hospital, and I checked the date of any research document to make sure I was not getting outdated information. Knowing exactly what I was dealing with was very important to me, and I wanted accurate and up to date information. I did the same with the treatment the oncologist was suggesting -- checked for reliable information.

    Have you been told what stage the cancer is in, and if not, what scans you need to have, and when? Is there already a treatment plan and dates? Do you do better with fuller information or prefer not get into things too deeply? 

    *  Another hug comes with this message too :)

  • I have mri scan on Monday I'm guessing this is to stage it ? and have am appointment due on Thursday yet to be confirmed with oncologist. I'm going private as we had bupa healthcare plan already. I am scared so trying not to research too much and just listen to what I'm told at appointments etc. Thanks for taking the time to reply x

  • Hello key , I was diagnosed with grade 3 triple negative on 30th September.   I have seen the oncologist and waiting for a chemo start date.  I am having an MRI on Thursday.   Make sure you take someone with you when you see oncologist.  I went alone and was so horrified at the hospital and the conveyor belt like process I didn’t ask any questions.  It is ok to be scared, some days I am practically frozen with fear and sadness , other days I just want to get on with treatment.  Have you been offered a test for the BRCA1 gene ?  I had mine last week . Results in 3 weeks . Ask questions here, share emotions, worries and concerns, talk to your BCN .  I am at the beginning of a long treatment plan .  We are all in this club we didn’t ask to be a member of, but it helps to share . Take care xx

  • Hi 

    I am sorry you find yourself in this club of unwilling members. Like you I have been recently diagnosed with IDC stage 3 and its well scary. Waiting is the worse and your whole world is turned upside down. We fear because we are only human and there is so much we can take. But the body and mind is an amazing space (keep positive if u can), rely on your medical team and medical science and us here!

    I have Onco on Thursday too...don't know what questions to ask! Ladies  any suggestions?

    I want to start chemo ASAP as I fear cancer spread and have been chasing up scans too. Some days I feel I can face this challenge and some days I feel a total wreck and cannot function. I guess that is normal as many women here say it is a rollercoaster ride.

    If I have one advice is to be kind to yourself, feel what u feel and take a step at a time, breathe and smile/laugh. Easier said than done I know....

    Sending you all the healing vibes, keep talking 

    C x

  • Hi Key 

    I don't have the same type of cancer as you, but  I can see Harlybear had been on here and offered support . This is a difficult time it gets better as you plan your fight back from the little bug.er that has set up home in your body. look after yourself and we all here for you Jayne x

  • Hello key , how are you feeling today .   Big hug to you xxx

  • Love the fighting spirit .  How are you today Jayne xxx

  • ok I have oncologist tomorrow and taking my husband and mri Monday, scary times. I am full of fear and anxiety. We are on this journey together let's fight this Muscle  xx