Where do you begin?

Hi Jen, thank you for your post. Great that you've found your way to this supportive space fairly early on this challenging path. Welcome.

Receiving a breast cancer diagnosis is such a shock to most of us. It can take some time to get our heads and hearts around it all. The early days can be especially difficult, as our initial diagnosis can change, as we undergo further tests. Then there is the waiting for treatment to begin. 

I was diagnosed in Feb 2024, had surgery in April 2024, followed by chemotherapy, radiotherapy and now hormone therapy.

Know that everything you feel is ok. As you have found, some folk will act strangely. Try to lean on those who are able to support you. Aim to keep up with any of your feel good activities.  Above all, be kind to yourself. Keep putting one foot in front of the other, before you know it, you'll have started, then completed your treatment and will be out the other side.

I too am self-employed. Honestly,  financially, it's been tough. But I had chemotherapy and wasn't able to work for most of the time during treatment. You may well fare differently. I have read many accounts of folk working  during their treatment. I saw a MacMillan Benefit adviser, they were really knowledgeable and supportive. 

As for which surgery, your surgeon should give you all the necessary information to enable you to make a decision, if needed.

I had both a mastectomy and lumpectomy, as I  had bilateral cancer.

You're welcome to ask any questions. I encourage you to use this forum.  You are amongst understanding friends.

Take good care of you and your boy. 

Sending all the hugs. Shaka

Hi Shaka

Thank You for your reply. I did ring MacMillan financial support on Friday so I have the details for what I can claim once I start treatment but I guess it’s while they process my application for it that I’ll have nothing coming in, I’m trying to work as much as I can now as they have prebooked me in for surgery for 29th April but depending on the mri will depend on what surgery I have. I am trying to be proactive to keep going and doing things I enjoy. 

How long are you on hormone therapy for? I was sure my nurse said 5 years but someone who has had cancer and in remission called me stupid as I won’t be on it that long so now I’m questioning what I heard the nurse tell me, this woman also told me it’s highly unlikely I will have surgery, radiotherapy and hormone therapy. My understanding was surgery removes the lumps, radiotherapy kills any remaining cells and hormone therapy keeps it away. I think that’s the problem is everyone has their own experiences and assumes it’s a one size fits all but everyone is different. I will be glad when I’m out the other side as I feel like I’m drowning in emotions right now.

How are you getting on now? 

kind regards 

Jen x

Hi Jen

All the things you are feeling and experiencing are absolutely normal after a breast cancer diagnosis. It’s such a shock and impossible not to think the worst and worry about the future. I know I found the part immediately after diagnosis the worst out of this whole thing by far. 

I was diagnosed at 46 last February, had a lumpectomy in April followed by radiotherapy (5 days) in July and been on tamoxifen since (and will be for 5 years). None of these treatments have been anywhere near as bad as I had built them up to be in my mind and I fully recovered quickly, back to work two weeks after surgery. I understand about curve balls, most people seem to have at least one thrown along the way, but try to trust your team are gathering all the information they need to tailor your plan to your specific circumstances.

This is the hardest part. I guarantee you will feel better when you have your full plan and know what is happening and when. x 

Thanks Eebee, that’s reassuring to know. I’m glad I decided to post on here now. 

Five years is fairly typical for hormone therapy but treatment plans are personal to each patient. My advice? Stop listening to your friend; listen to your consultant and the BCNs  

Hi Jenkirky86 , sorry you find yourself here but it’s definitely a great place for support and shared experiences. The person who called you stupid is not very well informed as it’s standard treatment for er positive breast cancer, to be on hormone therapy for 5 years. I’m a lot older but had a similar diagnosis I think, and my treatment was exactly as you’ve outlined: surgery, radiotherapy and hormone treatment. Each case is of course individual but this is a very typical treatment ‘package’. Good luck with it all, love and hugs, HFxx

Hi again, good to see you've had other responses,  it sounds like you're finding this helpful. 

I'm taking hormone therapy for 5 years but I'm 59 and post menopausal. I think it depends on age and maybe other factors. I second what others have said re your friend's advice. 

I'm mostly doing ok. I'm working part-time and will probably stay that way. I'm downsizing or maybe it's  side-sizing, sold my flat and bought outside London, so will be mortgage free.

My latest milestone was going out without a wig or headcovering. My hair is currently just fluff but I wasn't loving wearing a wig. 

There is life after treatment. Basically I'm still choosing life everyday. 

Sending all the positivity for your treatment.

Hugs, Shaka 

It’s a horrible stage until you have your post surgery results, it’s not until then that you’ll have a confirmed treatment plan. This could be chemo, radiotherapy and hormone treatment. I wasn’t due to have chemo but this changed post surgery. So be prepared there is a chance of your treatment plan changing. You will then feel in control as you’ll have a treatment plan with dates. Keep talking to your bcn or the breast cancer now line, they are great x

Hi there. I hope you are feeling ok. I was diagnosed last Oct at age 40 so not much older than you. I had a mastectomy as I have very small breasts so it felt like the best thing for me and to be honest I don’t miss my breast as I was so flat and I feel better that the whole thing was gone. I had to have lymph node removal too in Feb. I worked throughout both operations, not had any time off but I do work from home so managed just doing that. You will be surprised how quick recovery is and I would suggest no matter how you feel get up each day and do what you normally do, put your makeup on, smile and head out of the door, it is hard but it helps. 

I was told chemo would always be recommended due to my age as we have a lot more life ahead of us than older ladies (BCN words) so the oncologists like to give us everything. I’ve been recommended chemo, radiotherapy, hormone treatment, endocrine therapy which is very overwhelming but good we have access to everything preventative. 

Thanks everyone for sharing your experiences it really does help, I noticed while in the bath last night the main lump had changed again so nausea and anxiety kicked in again. I know I need to get used to it but it’s still a horrible feeling. I’m really struggling with sleep too I can fall asleep no problem but it’s staying asleep, I think it’s a combination of my fibromyalgia and too much on my mind! 

I work from home running a ironing business so hoping I can keep going as much as I can it’ll just depend on how painful it is post surgery for arm movement,