Newbie who can't sleep

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Hi all, 

I found a lump in my breast early Sept.  My GP referred me to the breast clinic for a mammogram.  It turned out to be a cyst, but they found an area of concern so I needed ultrasounds and biopsy.   Due to the location of the lump it took a few attempts/appointments to get the right spot.   

No health professional at any point seemed concerned about cancer.   I was told its likely an old cyst a few times.   I think they were as shocked as I was when the biopsy results showed cancer.

I had the results Fri just gone. I was told that it's low grade, they caught it early, and it doesn't look like it's in my lymph nodes.  I'm booked in for a lumpectomy on the 11th December.   I will have radiotherapy but unlikely to have chemotherapy.  I will know more after the lumpectomy but due to christmas I've been told it can take up to 5 weeks for the results which terrifies me.

I was told the cyst saved my life! I know the news could be so much worse and I do feel lucky to a degree, but it still feels pretty rubbish and mentally draining.  I have told a few people and they all seem to play it down (if that's the right term).  I feel like I can't say how I truly feel as I'm expected to feel strong because it's only low grade and caught early.   Is this a common thing or am I just being sensitive in my shocked and scared state?  

If you've read this far thank you! This is all very new to me so I hope it makes sense.

  • I cant sleep either ! I was told in May this year that mine was low grade and caught early and the consultant's words were " if you going to get breast cancer this is the one you want as it is so common" and like yourself I thought I should feel very lucky, but I didn't feel lucky or positive I was petrified and devastated. People say to you " think positive " but unless you have been faced with a diagnosis you don't know what it's like.

    It is an emotional rollercoaster and you will have many different feelings, all you can do is take each day as it comes, Macmillan are great but I found a service through Breast Cancer Now called Someone Like Me, they find someone who has had the same diagnosis etc and they call you how ever often you want to chat or ask any questions. I felt I could really say how I felt with my lady and was relieved when she had felt the same. This is all something that you never want to experience and it turns your world upside down no matter how low grade. 

    I hope all goes well and be kind to yourself x

  • Thank you so much for the reply.   It means a lot to me.  Especially at this time of day! I will take your advice on board. 

    I really hope you are doing as well as you can be now. X

  • You're welcome, this can be a lonely journey especially in these dark hours, but it definitely helps to know there are many others who feel exactly as you do.

    I am doing well physically and trying to cope mentally and each day is a new day.

    Lots of love x