New here

Hi Tina Robin,

Sorry to hear the stress, it is a worrying time and the waiting is the worst.

It sounds like you've had a time of it recently. You supported both your husband with the loss of his mother and your daughter with her exam results. I'm sure they would want to support you. It's hard on family as they don't know what to say or do. My partner is very supportive but sometimes I try to shield him from my worries. 

If it does turn out to be breast cancer there are lots if good treatments out there now.

You've done the right thing by joining the forum. The macmillan nurses and cancer care are great supports.

I hope all goes well for you. Please use the forum to chat xx

Hi Tinarobin,

I had a lumpectomy nearly four months ago and lymph nodes removed, I finished my radiotherapy a few weeks ago and recently, was told I am clear. It is a shock when you are told and it is important you take a bit of time to let it register and sink in. I am so sorry to hear what you have been going through, The strides made in modern cancer medicine are amazing and they can do so much for you, however, there is also a lot you can do for yourself.

You have made the first big step by finding the Macmillan site, also do visit your nearest Macmillan centre, a list is on here, or ring them on 0808 808 0000, they are superbly helpful and give you lots of great info, do walks, talks, help with benefits, bills, open 10-4 Mon-Fri for coffee and chat, and lots more. Please also get a good support structure in place, family, friends, good work colleagues, I’ve lived on my own for nigh on forty years, but realised you can’t do this on your own. I know you have had your difficulties and telling them won’t be easy, but if you don’t and they find out another way, this could hurt them more. I pray you will get the strength to do this, because it will a high hurdle passed and you can move forward.

I also go for a short walk every day (British weather permitting) and do a daily diary, this is mega helpful, as it gets everything off your chest and out of your system. It is important during the day to keep yourself occupied, hobbies, interests etc., it stops you from dwelling on what is going on. You may also find it beneficial to listen to a meditation podcast, they really help you to relax especially when you are trying to get to sleep. I use one called ‘Go Gently’ by Christine Elizabeth Smith, it does a lot for me. Whatever you do, do not visit Dr Google as there is so much conflicting information, your head will spin and it will stress you out, listen to your medical team and you get great support on here.

I know it’s hard sometimes, but try and keep as positive as you possibly can, have positive people around you and dump the negativity, above all, be kind to yourself - I promise you, you will get through this. You are never alone and can always come and chat to us shower in here.

Take care and big hugs.xxx

Thanks for all your advice, ao glad you have gotten the all clear.x

Hi Tinarobin , sorry you find yourself here but it’s a great place for support and shared experiences. And until you’ve been to the clinic, try to bear in mind that the majority of lumps are not cancer. I’ve had several previous referrals for what turned out to be benign conditions, including a fibroadenoma and cysts. All needed investigating and I feared the worst, but it was only my most recent lump that was cancer. That was nearly 6 years ago now. 
I played down that recent referral to my family and friends as my daughter was about to go off travelling for up to 2 years so I wanted her to go without worrying about me. I emphasised that I’d had lumps investigated before and they were all fine. I hope your referral comes through quickly and that all turns out to be fine. That’s what happens in the majority of cases. If it isn’t, as someone else has said, breast cancer is generally very treatable these days. And we will all be here supporting you, it’s a great community’. Sending love and a big virtual hug, HFxx

Hi Tinarobin,

Really sorry to read that you are dealing with so many other things as well as the worry about your appointment. I can so relate to how you are feeling. I only said to my husband a couple of days ago that the most overwhelming factor of all of this is the feeling of not being able to run away from it. I'm trying to cope by constantly pulling my mind back to what I know rather than searching for bridges to cross that I may never need to face! It's beyond hard but I'm exhausted and know that I have to find a new way to deal with what is happening. 

I hope you've found the right time to share with your husband. I'm sure he'd rather know so that he is able to support you. Have you had your breast clinic appointment yet? I had mine on Monday just gone and I'm due to see the surgeon this coming Wednesday for my results and my plan! I've been told it's probably cancer. I've been given the size and was told that they couldn't see anything in my lymph nodes. The appointment itself was actually OK. Obviously I was mega nervous but I went alone through choice so that I could focus on myself and not worry about anyone else.

I'm just coping hour by hour at the moment. I'm beginning to accept that I can't run away but I do have some control in how I deal with my feelings.

Big hugs and lots of love.

Oh I do understand how you feel. I had a scan a week ago in which she said it was almost definitely cancer . Appointment on Wednesday for biopsy results so many emotions . I haven’t  told my children yet till there is something to tell. So scared . Sending understanding hug 

• Rosie 

Thanks for your reply, so sorry to hear they think its cancer, hope all goes ok at your next app.xx

Hi, yes i have told my husband i cant believe how hard it was, i think it was just saying it out loud, having to face the possibility of what it could be. I got my breast clinic app its on the 10th which feels too long, getting through each day is ok, its sleeping im striggling with.x

I'm not even sure how I'm getting through to be honest! It's like I want Wednesday to come but at the same time I'm absolutely terrified. I'm OK one minute and a complete mess the next. I think I'd rather just have the results via a letter so that I could read and digest it alone. So I'm totally with you with regards to being scared.

My girls are all adult and I've told them all. We had a few things arranged that I've had to cancel so I told them as much as I know.

Bought myself a book about the importance of exercise before, during and after treatment... which I'm finding really positive.

Big hugs to you too for Wednesday xx

Thankyou hope all goes ok for you too.x