New Here.

Aww it's a good start that you reached out to this forum. I think most people have very similar feelings to you, we all have different circumstances and ways of coping.  But most of us to say the least feel very apprehensive.  Once your treatment starts it's a bit like being on a conveyor belt and I was just swept along with it. And I suppose had a 'sense of purpose '.   I also spoke to the Macmillan help line, which helped me a lot. I also spoke to the local Macmillan group who also offered lots of support for all my issues, different to yours...but valid and worrying for me.

Don't be too hard on yourself.....I am sure you will get lots of responses on here, as people will want to offer you support,  and you will see your feelings are fairly normal following a recent diagnosed . Sending very best wishes and a big hug x

Hi Lanie

Welcome to the forum and sorry to hear that you have been diagnosed with breast cancer. What you are feeling is perfectly normal.Try to keep yourself busy by doing something that you love. Try to get out in the fresh air at least once a day. Things should start to feel better once yo have your treatment plan. I was diagnosed with grade 3 triple negative breast cancer over two years ago and after having chemo, surgery and radiotherapy I made a full recovery.

You can ring the Macmillan helpline on 0808 808 00 00 to access supports that you need.

Wishing you the best of luck with whatever treatments your medical team puts you on.

Best wishes

Daisy53

Hi Lanie

I would echo what ChocolateChip has said. When I went for my results I think I was shocked but somehow expecting it. I stayed calm through most of the appointment, asked lots of questions - then suddenly it hit me. I went back to the car and sobbed. I then rang my partner and sobbed at him. Telling people was hard, but helped somehow (at least once I had an idea of the treatment plan). I think it made it more real.

You do then get onto a conveyor belt of appointments, check-ups, treatment, etc. That helped me - you are in someone else's hands. There are decisions to make but essentially someone else had taken control. I was shocked and scared. It became more scary as the date for surgery loomed and I remember my partner dropping me off and me just saying, "I'm scared." I felt like a small child. I think that 'before' is probably the worst time (at least it was for me). Afterwards my only focus was on sleeping and resting and getting better. I probably still do have a subconscious layer of 'scared' - will it come back, will the side effects of treatments continue to hit me hard? But I'm back to living my life (albeit, as many have said, it's from a different perspective now).

I was lucky to have a big support network: my partner, some good friends (with similar experiences), my brother, neighbours, etc. Accept any help you're comfortable with. I also called into my local Maggie's Centre. I didn't use them much whilst I was having treatment (too tired) but have visited a lot since. I've found it to be a great resource. 

I then decided to join this network - and discovered that I must have signed up soon after diagnosis but I'd totally forgotten about it! I have posted when I've been worried or just needing to vent; I've commented on posts from others. 

What you're feeling is natural. 

You can get through this. Keep asking and talking.

Sending good wishes and hugs.

Diane.

Thankyou all. I'm not sure how to post on here to everyone. I'm just tapping reply. Do I tap that or something else? 

Hi so sorry you're feeling like this and I did as well. You will soon have lots of dates, appointments so keep a file for everything. You said you exercise try yoga or pilates to help you, listen to calming music if can and most of all be nice to you. It's hard being positive take each day slowly wishing you all the best on the road ahead x

Firstly, I'm so sorry to hear how much you're struggling. I felt just like you do at the stage you're at right now. I was so shocked & I thought my life was over. Don't underestimate the effect shock has on you both physically & mentally as well - it's horrible. I shut down completely. I couldn't speak, eat, cry, sleep. I was just a numb lump that looked & probably smelled disgusting as I couldn't find the energy to shower either.

Can I suggest talking with your GP & seeing if there's anything they can give you to help you short term? Mine was great & helped me a lot. I've also had a lot of support from Big C including visits, chats & most importantly, counselling. I can't praise them enough & I really encourage you to contact any of the wonderful cancer charities that are available in your area. I promise it will help you with how you're feeling.

In the meantime I send you lots of love & a big hug xx