It's only just begun

Hi Bird17, sorry to hear of your diagnosis. I had a lumpectomy with sentinel node removal followed later by an axillary clearance. I had my first op beginning October and had healed nicely by about the third week. I then had to have another op which took about another 4 weeks to heal . Everyone probably heals at a different rate and it will also depend on the type of op - mastectomy or lumpectomy.

We told our boys (12 & 15 at the time) straight away. We didn’t hold back on telling them they knew from the moment I had my recall letter. We let them know when appointments were and updated them with everything we knew after every appointment. Nothing was kept from them even though our eldest was and still is going through mocks and GCSE’s. We also informed the school so if the boys had a wobble the teachers were fully aware. They to have been very supportive as some have either gone through their own journey or have had family go through it too so could offer support to the boys if needed. No one can tell you when you should tell children, it has to be when you feel comfortable in telling them. 
If you click on my name you can read my journey so far. 
You can always ring/live chat with the Macmillan nurses. They will be able to offer advice about how to tell the children too. 
Wishing you all the best for your journey.

Hugs from cuffcake x x x x x

Hi, we didn't tell our children initially because we didn't know at first what we were dealing with. So, it took three months from a routine mammogram to knowing that the cancer hadn't spread outside the breast. It was very hard to deal with the not knowing and what ifs - and we didn't want our children to go through that same worry. By the time the treatment plan was confirmed, I'd had surgery, and needed 5 radiotherapy sessions which last a few minutes, then hormone tablets. The prognosis was good - and whilst I'll still worry for the next 20+ years that breast cancer may come back, the odds are very high that it won't. So, it seemed OK then to not share something with the children that might never affect them. Our other reason to not share was around things that they were already going through - they were late teens/early twenties - one has learning disabilities, one was being treated for poor mental health, one had just started a university course and one was in gcse year. The downside is that you don't get the support from them. It's a very personal decision based on what you think is best. All the best for your surgery.