I think today has been my worst day, not the diagnosis, not the confirmation of everything not the lack of communication, not even feeling like I wasn’t treated well in an echocardiogram. But haven’t got up early prepared and organised as I’m caring for three adults in my house with one hour to go to my picc line appointment, and chemo tomorrow cancellation. I’m not one to be public with my feelings, but I am very sad and I’m very upset. It isn’t just the word cancellation. It’s all the effect it has on everybody. I have no faith anymore. I may just be an NHS number, but I have feelings and feel really helpless as I can’t do anything about it. I wish I was mega rich and could afford private care. I may feel safe then. X
