Breast cancer/mental health impact

Good morning, Strawberrycat

Sorry you have to be here, but welcome. It’s really tough coming to terms with all of this, such a shock and something we always think will happen to someone else. I found the waiting period up to surgery the hardest with various extra tests being needed and surgery being postponed. It was the not knowing and lack of control which threw me. I really struggled and couldn’t manage work and, like you, I was in my probationary period which was a huge extra worry as I was convinced I would be sacked for having too much time off. In reality my employer was incredibly supportive, I hope yours is being so too.

You are not being silly. It’s a massive thing to be diagnosed with cancer and go through treatment. Things which I found helpful was some sessions of MacMillan counselling, keeping a daily journal to get my worries out onto paper and, although I didn’t feel like it at times, doing regular exercise which I’m convinced helped with my physical recovery but also helped hugely with my mental wellbeing. 

Keep talking on forums such as this when you need to. People will understand how you feel and you don’t need to carry it all alone. x 

Thank you Eebee - it’s good to know that there are others who feel the same things. I really don’t think I’ve engaged enough with all the things that are available - I am definitely going to look at the MacMillan counselling and do write my thoughts and feelings down. You’re absolutely right in that the waiting and lack of control is one of the most difficult things. I will keep talking - thank you for your reply x

Hi StrawberryCat , would echo what Eebee  has said. The emotional impact of a cancer diagnosis can be huge, certainly was with me. But like lots of us I was always putting a positive spin on my cancer to family and friends, emphasising that it was relatively small, caught early, very treatable etc etc. But inwardly churning, scared and feeling very lonely. This site has been a huge help to me, a great place for support and shared experiences with people who ‘get it’. I guess that’s why I’m still rattling around here, 6 years later! I eventually made contact with my nearest Maggie’s centre, an hour’s drive away, more than a year after my diagnosis. It was a huge relief to see others in a similar situation face to face. I was able to get 6 weeks of ear acupuncture there to help with the Anastrozole induced hot flushes, and met a couple of lovely ladies who I still meet up with.

Work was a huge source of guilt for me, I was very lucky to have a supportive school but felt horrible about having time off. The MacMillan advisers can help with work related issues as well as emotional, by the way. 
Good luck with it all, do keep posting here, there are no silly questions. Sending love and a big virtual hug, HFxx

Hi Strawberry Cat, hang in there. It's a difficult time and though it's tempting to keep strong and hide feelings, it's really good to engage with others who understand. I'm waiting for radiotherapy starting on 18th December and am feeling increasingly tetchy and fed up. I hope it all goes well for you and that you remain kind to yourself as you go through each step. Best wishes. 

Thank you HappyFeet1 - I’m just in the process of contacting my nearest Maggie’s centre - it’ll be a good 50 minutes or so for me but I think it will be worth it. It does really help to speak to people who ‘get it’ even though everyone’s journey is different. Thank you for your reply and sending a virtual hug and love back xx

Hi Mouse62 - thank you for your reply. Sending love and a big hug - I really hope your radiotherapy goes well - best wishes xx