Feeling so guilty

Hi Dexie61

Dont feel guilty - you don’t know they would have found anything earlier. I have missed the odd 3 yearly mammogram because the previous one had been so painful. However I did attend my 3 yearly one just before COVID and all was clear. 3 years later I had 7.5 cms high grade DCIS which my consultant suggested had been growing for about 5 years. I asked why it hadn’t been picked up 3 years ago but he couldn’t explain. Wishing you best of luck on Friday. The main thing is it’s now been found and can be treated. Xx

Thanks BethS,

It’s so nice to be able to say exactly how you feel on here. I find it hard talking to my family as I don’t want to upset them. Mine is only 2cm grade 2 so hopefully is easily treatable. 
I’m being a bit of a drama queen today! X

Hi there, it's completely fine to be a drama queen on here whenever you want, often better here than with the family I know.  I had a clear mammogram about 18 months before I noticed a lump which turned out to be 5cm so I agree with BethS, they aren't failsafe.  Best of luck with your treatment plan.

Hi Dexie61,

My lump was originally measured at 3.6cm on mammogram. After CT it was 5.5cm which was only 5 weeks after. 

They told me that the mammogram can’t get the full shape of the tumour and doesn’t give the full picture, that’s why they do the extra scans. 

I also felt guilty at the beginning - like how could I miss such a large lump (probably the size of a lime!) - however, I have learnt not to dwell on this now. Other things take priority. 

Hopefully, when you get your results, this will be put to the side. Currently, you’re sat waiting for results and the thoughts go wild! Try don’t let them consume you.

Think of the positive that it’s been found and there are treatment pathways out there which are much better then years ago. 

Good luck on your results, xx

I missed a callback following a routine mammogram, I thought the hospital had sent me a duplicate appointment because of a mix up with holiday dates and so I didn't go.  6 months later my partner found the lump.  I kept apologising for weeks thinking it was all my fault.  Don't feel guilty, we all have reasons for how we deal with what we find and they are all valid.  You're getting treated now and that's what matters.  I hope it goes well for you

Hello!

I had a small lump - went to GP - sent for USS. 'Oh it's nothing, just hormonal.' My lump started to grow, me to myself 'it's just hormonal'

6 years .... yes, 6 years later I went to my GP and the rest is history. Thankfully it was still grade 2 but gosh what an idiot I was (I am also a nurse ...)

I felt a little guilty especially for the upset it caused my family. But I strongly believe if I can't change it don't stress too much.

Don't waste your energy on guilt, focus on positivity and moving forward. People said to me be positive and it real does help. 

I hope your results were okay, I felt better once I had a treatment plan in place and when I started chemo. 

This community helped me so much.

Good luck. xxx

Thank you for all your support. I am having surgery on 16th August followed by radiotherapy and tablets. 
I have been for an ultrasound on my liver today as a tumour showed up on MRI scan.

Fortunately they are pretty sure it’s benign but am going for another MRI to be certain.

I’ve had many sleepless nights and was convinced that it had spread to my liver and brain but am reassured today that it’s not as bad as I first thought!

Hi Dexi61 good luck with your surgery next week..we will all be thinking of you..xxx