Hi guys. I've recently been diagnosed with breast cancer. It's been caught early and will require a lumpectomy. So hopefully the treatment will have a successful outcome.
I have told my family and close friends. I'm quite an introverted person but my partner thinks I should talk about it on social media to raise awareness. I fully agree with that, and that it could help someone else but I don't want it to look like I'm after sympathy or for people to treat me differently?!? How do I go about it?
Thanks xx
Hi Ruby5592,
I had a lumpectomy about six weeks ago and two lymph nodes removed, so was in exactly the same boat as you. It is a shock when you are told and it is important you take a bit of time to let it register and sink in.
You have made the first big step by finding the Macmillan site, also do visit your nearest Macmillan centre, a list is on here, or ring them on 0808 808 0000, they are superbly helpful and give you lots of great info, do walks, talks and lots more. Please also get a good support structure in place, family, friends, good work colleagues, I’ve lived on my own for nigh on forty years, but realised you can’t do this on your own. Trust me, this is not about being after sympathy, it’s about letting people give you the help you need. I also go for a short walk every day (British weather permitting) and do a daily diary, this is mega helpful, as it gets everything off your chest and out of your system. It is important during the day to keep yourself occupied, hobbies, interests etc.,it stops you from dwelling on what is going on. You ay also find it beneficial to listen to a meditation podcast, they really help you to relax especially when you are trying to get to sleep. I use one called ‘Go Gently’ by Christine Elizabeth Smith, it does a lot for me.
If you haven’t already, then do apply for the Macmillan grant (they will tell you about it), it’s £200 and will help you a lot.
I know it’s hard sometimes, but try and keep as positive as possible can, have positive people around you and dump the negativity, above all, be kind to yourself - I promise you, you will get through this. You are never alone and can always come and chat to us shower in here.
Take care and big hugs.
Hi. Thanks for your reply. For now I think I will tell people as and when and not rush in to announcing it. I am generally quite a positive person so that should help. I will give the podcast a go. I think my dog will be getting lots of longer walks to help me clear my head. Post op my partner will stay for as long as needed & I will force myself to rest. Ironically 5 years ago I did do a Macmillan mighty hike. I work for the NHS and am in not doubt they will be supportive too. X
We have all been there and now we are here for you, I’m also a very private person the forum so helpful to chat and unload. I don’t think I was treated differently, my problem was I didn’t like being asked too many questions, however I think family and friends were just very caring.
Taking one day at a time at the moment, notepad a pen to write down what is worrying you, and you need to discuss with your breast cancer team
keep posting, wishing you well, fingers crossed for a good outcome.
hugs
It's 9 years since my diagnosis. I'm not a private person but I hate being centre of attention or pitied. I told my boss he could tell the office why I was off and I knew information would filter out to those in other departments I dealt with. I told my close family. I put nothing on my FB, After my 5 year sign off my daughter tagged me in a congratulatory post. A few PM me to say they never knew. In real life it seems some never knew either. For me that was perfect. Not hidden but not subjected to all the 'good wishes" and head tilting . You do what you feel is best & what you are happy with.
Hi, I was diagnosed 2 weeks ago, and found telling people quite exhausting, my job is a bit complicated and quite a few things have to change or be taken over because of needing time off for surgery and various appointments, within a day I was thoroughly fed up of having to tell people that would be affected in some way (colleagues, family, friends I'd have to cancel on etc). So in the end on the advice of another friend I set up a no reply WhatsApp group for updates, only admins can post. Debated a bit about it and told some key people separately but then just added whoever needed to know, told everyone they could leave group if they preferred and no offence would be taken and now I can just update with news eg MRI scan results. This means I'm not inundated with messages, people can still message me privately, everyone is updated at once when there is news and nobody has to see every else's replies. Have also outsourced telling certain groups of friends to other people and added a few as admins. It's been much easier this way to keep people informed, and all sorts of unexpected offers of help which is lovely. I think everyone needs to find their own way of dealing with their diagnosis - i think I'd have spent an entire week telling people if nobody had suggested this to me. Good luck with it all x
Hi. Thanks for your reply. Currently i'm only really telling people that need to know and close family and friends. Later in the week I will be informing work officially through occupational health. I work in a hospital on a ward, so my job may need to change. It can be quite physical at times. I'm sure once I speak to occupational health I will know more e.g. having radiotherapy I can't be working around women that may be pregnant so I may have to stay off work. I'm sure I'll get the answers I need soon enough.
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