Hi Everyone
this is my first post so bear with me l am now on my third time having breast cancer last time was 17 years ago so it’s come as a bolt from the blue all over again l have had chemo last summer which brought on early onset osteoporosis and radiotherapy in December my tumours are stable meantime but l will have ongoing treatment and it’s all about quality of life now . This morning my husband of 23 years tells me he is no longer attracted to me as l was asking him why he doesn’t want to be intimate with me and it seems like he doesn’t even want to touch me before last years diagnosis intimacy was not a problem he is 10 years younger but we have not experienced this before. He said it is to do with having to the caring l have needed we both have busy life’s and run two businesses l feel devastated as it’s been really tough going and l am starting to feel much better and now l feel like my world is collasping again and l might fall into a crumpled heep. If there is any advice anyone with similar experiences or words of wisdom that might help me please reply.
Hi, We all know that a diagnosis and living with cancer can be a very scary place to be. I believe it is the same for our partners who not only experience the loss of control but also a feeling of helplessness as they watch their loved ones go through difficult treatments . Our lives and those of our partners have changed and it can take time to get used to the new normal . I have been on both sides of this coin, nursed a husband through his diagnoses and then years later I get breast cancer. For me there were times of loneliness and sadness on both sides of the coin…….I have no words of wisdom apart from giving it time , sending you warm hugs x
Thanks Detchen for your kind words and taking the time to reply to me like you say it affects both of us and he has spent a lot of his energy looking after me and the last time l had cancer it strengthened our relationship not weakened it so just feeling deflated at the moment
Whatever cancer throws your way, we’re right there with you.
We’re here to provide physical, financial and emotional support.
© Macmillan Cancer Support 2025 © Macmillan Cancer Support, registered charity in England and Wales (261017), Scotland (SC039907) and the Isle of Man (604). Also operating in Northern Ireland. A company limited by guarantee, registered in England and Wales company number 2400969. Isle of Man company number 4694F. Registered office: 3rd Floor, Bronze Building, The Forge, 105 Sumner Street, London, SE1 9HZ. VAT no: 668265007