Needing some advice on who to talk to

Hi I totally understand how hard it is waiting I was the same. I had to have second surgery after chemo just a margin one but it delayed my rads start and the only thing that kept me going was the timetable of treatment and I ticked each bit off as I went but it wasn't easy . I focused on the end right at beginning of it all. Treatment finished April 2020. I think just take it week by week knowing your team are doing all the right things for a good end result. I just focused on family didn't have professional counselling but it might be something to explore. Be reassured it will actually fly by xxx

Hi Beyoncepower, I have just mentioned this on another forum but it sounds like this may be useful to you. I spoke to the Psychologist at the hospital(on the phone) yesterday . Accessed through the Breast Care Nurses and a 'Holistic person' who helps with all sorts of things at the Clinic. You may have this service at your hospital. The Psychologist was very helpful and supportive. Told me that my fears and anxieties were a normal response to horrible things happening to me and tried to give me strategies for coping with my treatment, which is a mastectomy on 1 June. It was really useful to speak to her and she's going to call again before my op to see how I'm going on. I am pretty frightened of what I need to go through and what life will be like after. I would recommend the Psychologist. They help you to understand how our human minds work and that we are not going bonkers. It must be very difficult for you having a child to look after through all of your treatment and feeling you have to be strong is so exhausting. Talk to the Breast Care Nurses and see if they can help you access some support from the clinic. I am sure they will have something for you.

All the very best to you, xx

Thank you for your kind response. I know you’re right. I think having a succession of bad days is just taking it’s toll. So glad you’re all finished treatment, wishing you well xx 

aw thank you for your lovely reply. We all have so much going on that it is a wonder that we manage to get through it all-have just read your story. Very reassuring to hear that the Psychologist has been a help. It’s hard to tell if I’m getting depressed, readjusting to all the hormone treatments or just finally about to explode after pretending to being strong for so long!! 
I will all my BCN tomorrow and get some advice. Thank you for sending me in the right direction abs understanding how I feel.

Good luck with everything xxx

Hi Beyoncepower

Have you had a look on Breastcancernow? https://breastcancernow.org/ They have a service called Someone like me where they match you with volunteers who have been though a similar situation- I haven’t used this service but others I know who have say they have found it really helpful. What you are feeling is perfectly normal, and although you are desperate to finish your treatment , when you do you may feel bereft and bizarrely the lack of appointments can cause real angst. Others think we are back to normal, but I remember asking my surgeon for a sick note for work the day before my first operation and she gave me one for nine months - I almost fell off my chair and told her there was no way that I would/could take off nine months from work, but in the end that was pretty much how much time I had off. Have you tried any mindfulness? There is an app that I downloaded which did help me find a bit of time in the day for a bit of peace, and it was not something I had ever done. 

The mental side, trying to keep things together for our families and keep life on track is really hard, and sometimes being able to speak to others who we don’t know can really help. 

Hope you manage to find some peace

Jo x