Diagnosed yesterday

Hi

Sorry to find you here but you will get through it one way or another. You have come to the right place and I am sure others who have been exactly where you are now will be along to support you. I can't help with the chemo because I only had surgery and radiotherapy but other members will . It is a major shock to the system and while coping with it all may not be easy  you will have good days as well. Please do not go on the internet for information - a lot of it is misleading and out of date.Instead you could ring the Macmillan helpline and speak to one of the nurses there -they are able to help and reassure  in a very caring way. I spoke to them initially and found great support!

Take a look at some of the other threads on here too if you are in the right mood-you may even find yourself smiling -yes really! The mutual support is great and we can be serious as well as having a giggle.I would particularly suggest the Awake and Caption threads to start with.Almost everyone has been in your position with just being diagnosed but the doctors have a plan for your treatment and recovery so go with it.Contact your breast care nurse ,she should be able to explain things more fully as it is a lot to take in at diagnosis.

I wish you well on your journey through this disease and send big virtual hugs xxxKwissy

Hi

Sorry you have found yourself with a cancer diagnosis, and the feelings you have are completely normal. I am now almost 4 years since diagnosis and can still remember the bewilderment I felt. You are suddenly plunged into a world you don't understand - we all have some experience of cancer, (my mum herself has had breast cancer) and play in our head at times how we would deal with it, but as you have found it is nothing like that! 

Some suggestions that I found useful

- don't think too far ahead, just concentrate on the next (or first) phase of your treatment. 

- write a list of what you would like to know about this treatment and ask your BCN or on here, or both,

- there are no such things as stupid questions 

- give yourself a time each day to worry and let your mind go into overdrive, say 4pm you will sit down with any information you have and give yourself half an hour to really let your feelings out. Outside of that time, just have a notebook to jot things down but don't allow yourself to dwell on things

- telling people was the hardest thing for me, I told people in batches and some I didn't tell, you decide what and how much you want to tell people

- someone will always have the story that makes you feel better, someone will also have the one that makes you feel worse!

- understand that some people really don't know what to say or do and just accept that, no-one is deliberately trying to hurt you, they just don't know how to behave in the situation

- treatment for breast cancer is do-able, it is not pleasant or in anyones bucket list, but I found the reality of chemo much better than the unknown thought of it all

- when you are actually having chemotherapy it is generally quite dull, take things to entertain you

- don't compare yourself to anyone else, your treatment plan is designed for you and treatments are now really tailored to the individual

- it does become easier, particularly once you have started on treatment

Hope this helps you a bit, I tried to keep positive and find humour in the darkest of situations and that helped me, but we are all different so don't feel bad if you can't feel like that.

Very best wishes

Jo x

Hi thankyou for your replies.  There are some really helpful points, I'm just so overwhelmed ...I also feel really sick and ill, probably because I can't eat or it's psychological? 

Nicki xx

Nicki

I remember those feelings of constant nausea together with overwhelming fear. In respect to eating, my doctor told me to eat high calorie snacks when I wanted something. I also had anxiety issues before my diagnosis and had a complete melt down when I went to see my doctor. I was given some anxiety medication and some sleeping tablets for a couple of days. It helped. I just needed time to try and get my head around the rollercoaster I had just jumped on to! 

It does get better when you start treatment. I would suggest building a relationship with your doctor, he wanted to see me weekly in the beginning - and I cried every time! I am now 2 years post diagnosis and I still take medication and I see my doctor every couple of months. 

There are helpful discussions on here when your treatment starts with hints and tips on getting through each stage. I found them invaluable. 

Sending virtual hugs...

Thanks for the reply GG I think its made it worse because my diagnosis was on a Friday so can't call GP or nurse .

I'm still trying to navigate around the site and find what I need like the number to call a nurse etc.

Nicki xx