AWAKE.........

My dearest Fruit Loops, please may I be sad tonight and tell you all why my heart is so sad and tears fall.

I went to a funeral today, he was a boy from my year at school. When we were 14 he used to send me love letters written in pencil on pages torn from a notebook. He was funny, and intelligent and kind and creative. He had a career in Art and a wonderful soul mate and sons. But when we were 14 he loved me and I can shut my eyes and see his smiling face and feel the love letter in my hand and the warmth in my heart.

Nothing ever happened between us, physically, (too young and too well brought up) but there were chances and tonight I wish I had let something happen. Life is so short, and lovely lads are few. Sorry for too much information. And yes it was cancer that took him, my teenage love xxxx

Sending you a big hug Snowys Mum xxx

Snowys Mum  Bless you, alas Time's Winged Chariot can hurt our hearts and  leave us sad but if there were no downs there wouldn't be any ups either. 

Helen Snowys Mum so sorry for your loss that must been heart breaking doesn't matter if you didnt do physically or not the bond was there and the feelings were real

yes I do miss home caring allot though against the rules I keep on touch with one lady who they care for she rings me asks how iam etc today I got a card for christmas I also keep in touch with daughter law of another client and finally a daughter whi client passed away her mother was very difficult but she had lot mh and quite nasty at times but i got through to her.

Xxxxx

Night night all, sending sleepy fairy dust for all who need it together with love and hugs from me xxx

Hey LondonLass guess what I’ve been doing today seem as Xmas is soon?  That’s right pretend Christmas shopping!  I went on a little train ride with my friend to Cardiff (just an hour away).  First step before hitting the shops was lunch and a bottle of wine!  Then we just looked around all John Lewis gift things on ground floor (we ignored rest of store)and I bought a personalised tin of quality street.  I was giiven option as a JL card holder of picking just one flavour for the whole tin but didn’t!  Then I bought a chilli cheese from a cheese stand after tasting it, my friend bought the coal flavour !!!  First shop was Cath Kidston where I bought myself a Merry Christmas mug !  Quite honestly we were exhausted after shopping for an hour so we went for a cheeky G&T!  With a carrier bag each we could shop no more so we stayed until train at 7pm !!!!

hope everyone has a good day xx

Grogg sounds like a perfect shopping trip to me  sadly even at 44years old, my days of enjoying wondering around shops is long gone! Coffee shops and places for lunch is much more rewarding

Snowys Mum Helen, so sorry to hear you had such a sad and emotional day. Sending you....

Which won’t make things better but will hopefully remind you that we are thinking of you and care for you VERY much!

A Special mention now for Cathy () who is currently back in Hotel NHS  Hope they are looking after you Hun and really hope you feel better soon! 

You know if you don’t want to write cards or wrap presents just don’t do it, you don’t need to get yourself booked into hotel NHS just to get out of it  Take Care Hun! Love you. Sal xxx

, your post made me laugh! That’s exactly what my dad is like! Even down to the gifts ‘he bought’ my mum! He’ll look and go “ oh nice, who got you that” to which mum replies “you did”!!!!  

They’ve been together 48years! So she’s used to him now!! I think!!! 

Yes indeed. This is my OH to a 'T'. We've been martied 49 years and you learn to adapt mostly just every so often I explode!!!

Grogg Coal cheese - seriously?! Chili, on the other hand, is good. Thumbs up!

LondonLass thank you for the update on and best wishes to her for a swift recovery!

I'm sorry that I've not been on (again) and that I've been rubbish at replying to messages, I will get back to everyone later today, but I just wanted to write a quick hello and apology to everyone. I've been feeling a bit down. My midway scan showed no progress from the chemo and in fact my abdo lymph nodes have got worse. I am trying not to feel hopeless but it has been difficult. So, yeah, I've been in a bit of a self-pitying slump and I keep randomly crying about nothing - even happy things and nice things, because I'm scared that I won't see them again. And wow, what a downer... I should shut up, since this is hardly very uplifting! I will be "back to normal" next post, I promise.

J xxx