Does anyone else dislike the Macmillan Brave the Shave campaign?

Catchpole

Glad you got to keep your red hair - love your story!

Not vain at all - it was odd that I didn't get upset when they told me I had cancer, but when they said I had to have chemo pre surgery and would lose my hair.....that's when I cried! My breast care nurse said this was the thing that upset the majority of women.

I'm with you on some more upbeat adverts - one or two around now which are much better. Totally changed your perspective of them when you are in treatment doesn't it?!

Hope you are doing ok.

Unknown said:

I agree.i was lucky enough not to have chemo so I didn't lose my hair but when I was first diagnosed, the thought of losing my hair was the thing that upset me most.I was even accused of being so vain by friends,  I spose because I was in my 60s and single I m not supposed to care how I look, well I do.I grew my hair when I was just over 60, id had short hait for years,but this "older women shouldn't have long hair" wound me up so much,i decided to grow it,and as my brunette locks had bits of grey, I dyed it red,  I love it, I vowed never to cut it short again just have regular trims so thought of losing it uspet me so much, Im sure all these people are well meaning  with this "brave the shave" but I hate it,To be honest im not keen on the other adverts for cancer, I hated the last years one where the bloke sits in an icy wasteland and the caption "cancer is such a lonely thing" comes up.  Totally depressing, Lets have a few more positive adverts and campaigns, Cancer is bad enough we dont need all this downbeat stuff,

Hi , I totally with you on the "60's and single and not supposed to care"

I met up with one of my friends mums just recently and she's in her 80's and I'm not being judgemental but she'd lost a front tooth and I just felt, when did you let your standards slip? She was always so well turned out , tall, elegant, beautiful, sophisticated, educated, intelligent, and up to speed on private dentistry for sure. !!!

I thought there'd be a time when it didn't matter, at that moment I realised it's not the case, it will always matter.

I love the fact you grew your hair and dyed it red.  Reminds me of an aunt who was, and actually still is, the most glamorous woman I've ever met. Also well into her 80's now.

I wore a wig throughout chemo and nobody even realised I was ill.

It wasn't until I finished and my hair started to grow that I stopped wearing the wig because it was slipping and besides I figured it 'didn't matter'

how wrong I was

people looked right through me

none of the nurses in the MDU recognised me !!  I'd been on first name terms with them throughout my treatment, 5 whole months, and they just didn't realise it was me.

Our hair is such a defining part of us.  It really does allow others to recognise us and interact with us.

It is a critical part of our being.

No wonder we freak out at the thought of it all falling out .

And when was it clever to make people cry to get them to donate ? 

People are going to die if you don't give us money.

Surely it is more witty, clever and amusing to say, a lot more people will survive if you do give us money, without the 'they're gonna die if you don't' undertones.

These creative agencies don't give their time for nothing !!!  they're all on BIG BUCKS contracts for this 'easy tears' stuff.

make them accountable to us, the 'clients'

make them applaud the fact that most people get a lot of essential emotional support via crowd sourced peer to peer routes

I'm not saying that it's wrong to shave your head to show support, but as they say, people do that anyway.

Carolyn

x

Hi,

Thanks for that,

The reason I took HRT for so long was the fact that my mum had early menopause too and she got osteoporosis very badly she was taller than me,im the family miget. lol but by time she died I towered over her,  It totally crippled her and my mum was a very smartly dressed lady. she hated seeing  herself with this horrible hump, she basically just gave up, She had to go into care my dad couldn't cope with it,he bless him was 5 years older than her and lived till 98. She didn't look like my mum any more I hated seeing her that way, and she would have hated it too, she was too bent to see herself in mirrors, A girl I knew was one of carers in home and she only recognised my mum by my picture by her bedside. That's how much she had changed, So Carolyn you can see why I felt as I did when I got BC, i didn't ever regret taking HRT for so long,i never wanted to end up looking like my mum, I do care about how I look and I always will. Luckily I have inherited my dads teeth he had them till he died, no chipslol. I don't think people realise how women are tied up with their hair, losing it is crap, i give thanks every day i didn't when i brush it.i overplucked my eyebrows when young as we all did in 60s, i have to pencil them in, but ive still quite good eyelashes., A strange side effect of node removal seems to be underarm hair doesent seem to grow, Now that i can live with.  June.

[quote user="Judyr58"Good evening everyone

I have seen two Macmillan TV adverts this evening, as well as lots of adverts on their Facebook site - and this website - for Brave the Shave,

This is encouraging people to raise money for people affected by cancer by shaving their head - it has fostered a climate where people think it is showing support to people who have lost their hair by doing this too.

Even my own daughters offered to shave their heads when they knew I was to have chemo and lose my hair - talk about brainwashing!

I can't think of anything that would have made me more upset than to see them lose their hair too.

I have pretty much powered my way through 8 cycles of DC and had every side effect it could throw at me, one stay of a week in hospital, and four times they called me in because of various things, two bad reactions in the chair - but the one thing that reduced me to tears wasn't being told I had cancer, it was being told I would lose all my hair in the second week of the first cycle.

And I don't need to tell any of you how hateful I found having huge handfuls come out in the shower (and I had short hair so hadn't thought it would be so horrid).

And then your eyebrows and eyelashes go - and your femininity feels like it's being stripped away bit by bit.

Frankly I find people who say they will get their head shaved as support, and that say they do it to "share" our experience haven't a clue! They might choose this, we haven't chosen it - and wouldn't.

It may sound over the top to some of you, but I find this whole campaign offensive, insensitive and patronising - particularly seeing people smile while having their head shaved, and people cheering. I didn't smile, and my daughter and husband didn't feel like cheering when they shaved my head.

Ok I'm cool with my look now - the very shiny head (not a short razor clipped look) - but I would prefer not to have had to experience any of this.

If you agree - please let me know.

I have messaged Macmillan previously and never even had a response. I've commented on Facebook under their posts in the past urging people to find fun ways to raise money (and there are so many) and not to do this for me.........and there is always a huge response in terms of "likes" and comments from people in our reluctant community.

If people are with me - maybe we can convince Macmillan to stop this barbaric approach to fund raising. Either like this post or put a comment of support please - if you don't agree, that's fine, no need to do anything!

Well - that's my rant over - you might have noticed I feel a tad passionate about this!

] I totally agree with all you have said. I feel sick to the bottom of my stomach when people say they are having their head shaved to help raise funds for cancer charities! There must be nicer, better ways to raise money. I feel patronised that someone would think they are sharing my experience by shaving their heads - as though that experience was all there was to it & the day after my head was shaved it started growing back (not!!!!) thank you for posting your feelings - I felt guilty I was being mean when all people want to do is help. Just help in a different way - that's great! 

If this brilliant website could form some sort of  2 boxes...One to tick for AGAINST 'Brave The Shave' and One to tick FOR 'Brave The Shave'  This would give a very clear picture of  how much/little everyone on here feels about this offending  (in my opinion) ad Macmillan have created. 

good idea! This issue obviously isn't going to go away.

xx

Hi Kacang....ls this my bc buddy awake at silly o'clock like me ?  I'm having 3/4 Taxo on Thurs, and apart from l look dreadful (puffed up eyes...look 20 yrs older!)  My only suffering is quit unbearable heartburn. Normally milk is my saviour (and Esomeprazole l take for a reflux thing)  But neither are helping. l'll ask my chemo nurse on Thurs.   Hugs xx

Hahahahaha - no don't forget I'm in Australia  so it's afternoon for me. I always try to look at this site during the day to pick up anyone who is sleepless and distressed.

Stay strong, lots of love

Lynn xxx

PS  try ranatidine (Zantac) for the indigestion. It's what I was given before each chemo infusion. Worked for me lol. xxxxx