My son had testicular cancer and it had spread to his lungs this was diagnosed in December 2020. He was coping well then in May 2021 he suddenly collapse at home and it was found it had spread to his brain. They started chemotherapy again but while having it he had a problem with his hand they did a MRI and found he had more tumours in his brain. On the 13th of September I was told it was terminal he had left the room as he did not want to know. Over the next few days I did manage to tell him that the Dr had said he only had a few months but on the 17th he had a massive brain hemorrhage and passed away the following morning. I have had lots of support from family and friends but now I'm finding it extremely hard to cope. I lost my husband 2.5 years ago and I was starting to cope a little better but now I am feeling totally lost, angry, hurt as well as feelings I can't discribed. I sometimes I'm having panic attacks, but feel I can't breakdown as I need to be strong for my daughter's and grandchildren. I don't know how to cope when I'm at home alone.
Hi Jonsmum
so sorry for your loss. Sending you love and light and hugs. I can't imagine how hard it has been for you.
Grief is a journey itself so its still early days and all the emotions and feelings that you are going through are perfectly normal. Please don't be too hard on yourself. This will take time for you to process and it can't be rushed. it takes as long as it takes. Its maybe too soon but there is a group on here that might be able to offer you some comfort and support. Its (+) Bereaved spouses and partners forum - Macmillan Online Community. It’s always good to talk so have a think about calling .Macmillan Support Services on 0808 808 00 00 - most services are open 8am to 8pm, 7 days a week. They offer all sorts of support including emotional support and a friendly ear to listen.
Stay strong. You are doing so much better here than you give yourself credit for.
Sending you a huge virtual hug.
love n hugs
Wee Me xx
Macmillan Support Line - 0808 808 00 00, 7 days a week between 8am-8pm
