hate telling ppl i have cancer

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got diagnosed w grade 3 astrocytoma about a month and a half ago now and ive barely told anyone. my gf and a couple of mates know but i havent told any of my family or uni lecturers or whatever. i know i should tell ppl to get support or whatever but i just hate telling ppl. struggling thru an essay for uni rn cuz i dont wanna talk to my lecturer and ask for an extension Upside down how r u meant to tell ppl shit like this ?? 

  • Hi creature_feature

    a warm welcome to the group. Sorry to hear about all that you are going through. Life's cruel.

    Telling people is never easy. My late husband was diagnosed with a stage 4 brain tumour in Sept 2020 and initially he didn't want to tell anyone. He told me and then our young adult children and forbade me from telling anyone else. That just wasn't practical! He struggled to tell his closest friends but it did make life easier once he had. You'll find the right words in your own time. 

    There's some guidance on the main body of the website. Here's the link Talking about cancer | Macmillan Cancer Support . 

    I remember going into work two days after his diagnosis knowing I had to tell my boss what was going on. On the drive in I rehearsed over and over in my head what I planned to say and in the end said none of what I'd gone over. I blurted out the truth plain and simple. "G has been diagnosed with a primary brain tumour and I don't know what we're dealing with." or words to that effect. She was brilliant and was so supportive as we navigated the path ahead. 

    I'd recommend you tell your lecturer or student advisor if you have one. You could always email them if that's easier than a face to face conversation. 

    This is a safe and supportive space so please reach out here anytime. There's always someone about to listen who gets it, someone to hold your hand and to offer a virtual hug when its needed. You're not alone. We've got you.

    It’s always good to talk so please remember that you can also call the Macmillan Support Services on 0808 808 00 00 - most services are open 8am to 8pm, 7 days a week Clicking here to see what is available. This service provides lots of cancer information, emotional support, benefit and financial guidance or just a listening ear.

    For now I'm sending you a huge virtual hug and lots of strength to find the right words to say to the folk who need to know. You can do this.

    love n hugs

    Wee Me xx

    Macmillan Support Line - 0808 808 00 00, 7 days a week between 8am-8pm

  • Sorry to hear of your situation. I have a grade 4 glioblastoma and the only people who know are my husband and my music teacher who I had to tell due to the disruptions in lessons, practice etc. 

    I share only on a strict need to know basis and right now there isnt anyone else in family or friends or work colleagues who need to know. 

    Is there maybe one lecturer or person you can share with, save keep telling people and let that person advise others who need that information? 

    take care