Hello

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Good Morning,

Nice to meet you all. Not completely sure If I am in the right place but I`ll write this Introduction anyway...

Life has been somewhat crappy over the last 16 years. It all started when I was aged 39 when I found out my Daughters Mother was having an affair. It triggard off what I know now as Mania from underlying Bi-Polar Disorder. I was playing In a fairly popular ska band as the crazy front man. My life literally exploded with my craziness and actions. This led to homelessness, class A drug addiction and multipe Pysvh ward sections. In 2018 something clicked and with the help of meds I pulled myself together. I live In a wonderful home, i got my finances sorted, got into a stable relationship. Life was getting better. I even got myself fit again. Then when I thought I had it nailed and could put all the crap behind me, I had a Bicycle crash. It was quite a bad accident. They did an ultrasound and found a suspicous shape in my Liver. They then did a CT scan with dye to look closer. To my relief they found that the shape In my Liver was an old bleed from my bike crash which had been absorbed, processed by the time of my CT scan. They noticed that my Lymph nodes in my stomach were swollen and that I had a suspected Appendix Mucinous Neoplasm on and around mt Appendix (excuse me If I have got the spelling wrong)

The consultant sent me a letter saying that I had "A slightlyswollen Appendix" But he also included in the letter a copy of the letter sent to my GP. I have an appoinment with the consultant on 11th March to discuss treatment. On the gP letter he said he would perform an Inspection of my Colon and Intestines then remove my Appendix.

I think I have had this problem for at least 5 years because my medicallytrained Pyschiatrist would Inspect my Lithium Inspired blood testa and remark that there  are markers In my blood to suggest some swelling or allergy. This was never followed up so I didnt worry about it.

I dont have anyone I can talk to about this and really dont want to worry my daughter or family with this. They all have enough problems going on at this time and I really do not want to add to it especially after all the worries I have caused over the last 16 years despite trying VERY hard to not Involve them.

I would appreciate it if any of you guys have had the same experience or similar. I would also like to get to know a few of you.

Have a great day. W

  • It sounds kind of silly but I feel as I have been cursed by God. When things have gotten really bad, I have preyed to him but then things get worse. I really do try to be a good person and devote my life to try and help others. I may have done something really bad to deserve all the crap that has happened over the last 16 years.

  • Hello 

    Welcome to the bowel forum . Firstly I am really glad you joined in . You have had a tough time for sure but I hope we can be of some assistance as you find your feet with this most recent diagnosis.

    Secondly can I say how pleased I am you are enjoying your home and you have reached a stable place with your bipolar disorder. I am sure you and your team have both worked very hard to achieve that and I wish you much more happiness in that regard . I am delighted to see your liver shadow was a resolved blood clot . When I was reading your post I was thinking your liver enzymes would be well reviewed with using lithium.

    Illnesses are very hard to understand but I can reassure you they are just cell mutations and it also sounds as though you are being lined up for surgery which is very good news around here .

    Cancers that start around the appendix often join us in the bowel forum as they follow they often follow the same treatment protocols.

    Your case will go before a meeting called the Multi Disciplinary Meeting MDT where a group of clinicians decide the best medical pathway for you . They always have a good look around when they are doing surgery . After your initial consultation the team will get your pre assessment appointment sorted out and schedule you into a theatre slot .

    Everyone feels as though they have turned a wrong corner when they arrive here but with the right support , lessening the sense of bewilderment and reducing the fear that comes with these experiences most people find a way forward .

    You might also like to speak to our helpline staff 0808 808 0000.

    They would be happy just to chat also .

    There are many people who have two different conditions to manage at the one time and they get through this . 

    Have you made it back on your bike yet or are you skipping it just now ?

    Anyway , take care ,

    Court 

    Community Champion Badge

    Helpline Number 0808 808 0000

  • Hi and a warm welcome to the board from me. has sent you a brilliant reply and I hope it has helped you. 

    You obviously have a deep strength inside, although you may think it’s hidden quite deep at times, and have used that to overcome issues in the past and to get you to where you are now. There’s an analogy used on one of the other boards that I like and it’s that life is like a car journey. The past is like your rear View mirror - things get smaller and more blurry the further you drive, whereas as the present and future is like the windscreen -wide and open. Please try to look through the windscreen and leave the past behind - your daughters mother obviously hurt you deeply but don’t let her action continue to blight your life today.

    You are in no way to blame for your medical conditions although it’s easy to try and find a ‘cause’ for your ailments then your mind starts to run away with you. I used to have ham salad for my lunch at work and began to wonder if it was the processed meat - sounds daft now - but mu oncologist said no it was just the luck of the draw.

    Please think about talking to your family though. I don’t like to worry people so keep it bottled up but it upset my husband as he felt he couldn’t help me if he didn’t know how I was feeling and also that it was more serious than it was and I was hiding it?

    I hope you’ve managed to resume your bike riding. My husband is bipolar and finds it really helps him. Do you still do anything on the music front? 

    Sorry I’ve not been much help on the medical front but just wanted to welcome you. There’s a monthly catch up thread on the go so if you ever want to post just a general chat, photo, comment or share with us how your days been then we’ll see you there!

    community.macmillan.org.uk/.../march-catch-up-thread-2021

    Take care

    Karen x

    Macmillan Support Line - 0808 808 00 00, 7 days a week between 8am-8pm
  • Thank You so much Karen. What a lovely message. Please do not think I am being ignorant by replying so late. I am up to my neck in calls with a charity I work for and will reply in more detail asap. Thanks again. Will

  • Thank You very much for your message Court. It was very comforting. As I mentioned to Karen I dont want to come across as being Ignorant by replying late. I am up to my neck in some work and will reply in more detail later on. Thanks again. Will

  • Hiya Court, Thanks again for your reply. I didnt have any time yesterday to reply properly. I "Try" to keep myself as busyas I can and to stay as fit as I can. I am bragging here lol but I managed 420 push ups plus a 10k run. I do peer Mentoring for a Mental Health Charity which fills the time. Yes I do have regular blood tests monitering my lithum levels and a whole load of other checks to ensure that the Lithium annd other med I use (Quityapine), Is not causing any damage. When they found this suspicious shape In my Liver the enzymes were fine. Thank-You for explaining the process that I will go through with finding n my Appendix. I do say to the only person that knows about this situation that I am lucky that It didnt turn out to be Liver Cancer Instead it was my Appendix. Luckily we do not need our Appendix so with hope all  It is, Is a case of whipping out my Appendix, Job done. I do worry that It may have spread to my colon but try and remind myself to deal with the Information I have right now and not go off on a tangent.

    Many Thanks once again. I hope you are feeling ok?

    Will

  • You are amazingly fit ! Well done you . I have been increasing the length of my walks but that’s about it .

    Looking back over your first post I think it’s quite striking that you were only diagnosed due to the bike crash.  An incidental finding ! That could be really helpful in terms of catching it before it’s making you symptomatic. 

    I am a big believer in taking your experiences in life and using them to help others . That’s great you do that . Sometimes the only thing we have to offer is a little kindness but it’s something !

    I think once you have had a chat with the surgeon you will feel much more in control of this situation . A plan is always a good thing .

    Take care ,

    Court 

    Community Champion Badge

    Helpline Number 0808 808 0000

  • Hiya Court, Sorry about the delayed reply. I haven't been in here for a while and have been run off my feet.. 

    It's great that you are doing something to stay fit and increasing you're walking distance. I know how hard it is getting out there every day especially during winter. The sofa, Netflix or a book can be very tempting.

    Yes I agree with you regarding doing something to help others and commend anyone that does so. 

    I was lucky enough to be invited to work as a peer mentor for both a charity and the mental health services calling people who are struggling during this time. I intend to become an advocate once the training is in place. I have also become a source of support for a few friends experiencing mental health problems.

    Talking how they discovered how I had this form of cancer was by chance. So perhaps it is a lucky break. I do think I have had this problem for a number of years after my medicalky trained psychiatrist mentioning a number of times that there were markers in blood that indicated inflammation or an allergy. It was never followed up. 

    I have also experienced a flu type feeling regularly but put it down to my thyroid not working and being on jess for it. 

    Not sure If this is a good or bad thing. 

    Nice chatting to you Court and thanks for your message 

    Will x