Hoping to hear this coming week

Good afternoon everyone x

The wait for results is so stressful as it is for all sorts if things. 

I don't mean to sound dramatic but it feels like my life depends on the outcome of the MRI CT and biopsies. 

I have been feeling more tired with he stress of these past few weeks and I'm a little concerned that I am now losing weight however I haven't necessarily eaten enough and have been fighting off the stress and anxiety of it all. So hopefully that's it. 

I had bloods taken around 4 weeks ago and there were no markers or concerns with the results and my white blood count was normal.

The pain in my rectum doesn't necessarily seem worse but even the new pain killers I'm on, Naproxine, don't seem to hold off the pain for more than a few hours.

I guess I have just wanted to come on here and share how I am currently feeling. My Dad my friends are just saying try not to worry and maybe the results won't be as bad as you are fearing or led to believe as my consultant was very direct with me last Monday after biopsies and said he thought it was a tumor in my bottom! 

Everything is just bewildering and like I'm an outsider looking on and then the panic sets in. This morning in bed I couldn't control my panic my propranolol tablet didn't help so I had to get up. 

Does it become easier to bear when I get the results and know what I am dealing with? I'm hopeful that it hasn't spread and is treatable. 

I'm so sorry if I am repeating myself from previous posts it's just lovely to be amongst a community of us all facing or that have faced similar 

Much love to you all

PaddyBud