Bowel cancer CARERS, FAMILY & FRIENDS chat

As soon as I find out I will post..

I hope everyone else is bearing up as best you all can xxxx

Hi Everyone!

Well one year on. This is my anniversary weekend of Jay passing. I actually feel quite calm. Just sitting thinking what I was doing this time last year and it was that I was just trying to comprehend that I had just become a widow after 40 years. Hardly feels like a year and just as if time has stood still and I've just gone with the flow along with all the other cliches that go with this. 

Looked after my little granddaughter Myla this morning for a few hours again from `stupid o'clock on a Saturday morning` (6.30a.m.) until 2 this afternoon when her mum and dad came to collect her. Both working again.  She slept most of the time she was here though as Nicole said she had been up since 4 this morning. But what a lovely surprise I got. They brought me in a lovely bunch of flowers and box of chocs. William got mixed up and thought Jay and I's anniversary was next week but it was yesterday (21st) so this I think was kind of `rushed` but thoughtful gesture in anycase and I have been told I'm being taken out to dinner next week- obviously because William thought anniversary was next week. 

William can hardly believe it's been a year too and he said the same thing it just feels like yesterday. I remember last year on this day they took me out for lunch it was a scorching hot day I remember and I cursed myself for wearing jeans  and we went to Rouken Glen Park just outside Glasgow they have a garden centre there with restaurant attached and there was a little `fun day` on for the kids with a mini funfair with rides for them. Think it was their way of just getting me out of the house for the day which was good of them. 

So if there is anything worth watching on TV later apart from football or horseracing I will have my choccies and few wee gins and raise a glass to Jay. Even if nothing on TV I'll find a movie on Amazon or Youtube or something. Maggie all the best with Les hope things have gone well for you both. Jkee hope you are baring up well also with Simon and Matt hope things are going ok for your dad. Take Care Everyone. 

Vicky xx

Vicky I can’t believe the year has gone it just seems to have disappeared. Raise a glass for jay from us all. How nice to have a bunch of flowers so thoughtful. The tv is just full of football. Glad you had your granddaughter as they do bring so much joy. Hopefully we will see ours a lot more but we will see. He is in recovery at the momenbut hope to see him tonight. I feel a little more settled. Enjoy that drink and relax xx

Vicky I have just raised my mug of tea for Jay sorry I don't drink. I also remember your telling us a year ago what a year we have all had in different ways. You have been amazing and strong the whole way love to you and your family god bless xx

Thank goodness he is in recovery I remember getting that call he is in recovery you just think thank god he made he didn't care about anything just that they get through to recovery good start bet you can't wait to see him all the very best for his recovery xx

Hope you are well rested Helen and had a lovely holiday. My one year Jay anniversary of his passing this weekend. Feeling relatively calm about everything have posted to the others and wishing Maggie well with Les. Take Care. 

Vicky xx

Hi we had a lovely time away and scattered Levin and Paul’s ashes at the top of Monte Baldo up in the clouds, I shed a few tears but had a huge hug off Sally. Don’t know where the time is going as it seems ages since Paul paaawd and it’s only 8 weeks. As for Kevin 14 months sometimes feels just like yesterday. I have a big birthday on Tuesday but letting it slide quietly by as doesn’t feel right. Hope Maggie get some rest following Les’s op and it Is good news. 
Hope everyone is bearing up Ok. A year for Jay so will raise a glass and think of you

Helen x

Thank you all. He is still in recovery. Have to ring again at 7.

Helen I am so pleased you had a lovely time and I hope you relaxed  it sounded amazing  

like Vicky you are so brave and strong.

i don’t drink so will raise a cup of tea for you and your family  

love and hugs to all xx

Well been to see Les thank goodness. He is quite drugged up but sometimes talking okay. He had a spinal block as well and said which I found funny, I can’t find my Willy, I told him he would not be able to due to the spinal block.  He also wanted a wee but said he did not want to wee the bed and I said it is okay. He did not know he had a catheter in.  I am pleased I got to see him.  His obs were okay apart from temperature was on the low side. 

obviously I am thinking of you all and send hugs xxxx

Thank goodness he is back you should sleep better tonight Maggie Les will hopefully tomorrow he will be more awake and on the road to recovery xx