Hi, I don’t know where to start really, my mum who is 85 was diagnosed with Stage 4 bowel cancer 4 weeks ago, it has spread to her liver and lungs. Due to her age they won’t offer any treatment which now I understand but to start with I was angry. My dad has just had a knee operation and is only just mobile, I live 100 miles away and feel very guilty for not being there every day. After her initial consultation she has no follow up appointments or home visits scheduled. My dad asked the question ‘how long’ and was told days, maybe weeks and seems to be taking it better than I am. She has no pain relief and is in obvious pain but refuses to contact the doctor for help. I call every night and am visiting as much as I can, once or twice a week, I feel very useless and being an only child have no siblings to share whats happening. Only my son knows that his Nan is dying because my twin girls are in the middle of their first year university exams and I hate keeping it from them. I’ve been keeping my fingers crossed that she stays well for 2 more weeks then I can tell them and hope they understand why they were the last to know. Work have been fabulous giving me time off to travel up for visits but now I’ve got a kidney infection so I feel guilty for not being in work. The stress of juggling everything is driving me mad.
