Hi all, thank you for accepting me. My husband has been diagnosed with stage 4 bowel cancer. At present I am not accepting it, it makes me feel sick, panicky, shaky etc. it was a complete shock. Anybody else in the same situation. Many thanks
Oh torry that is dreadful. I have no words that would comfort you but thank you for letting us know. Your head will be in shed and all over the place until it sinks in. If your daughter wants to stay let her as it will also be company for you and a problem shared is a problem halved. I am really upset for you and you are in my thoughts. Love Maggie xx
So, I've gone from being `elated` slightly to `deflated` in one fell swoop. Me n my BIG mouth. Jay not long off the phone. They are sending him home tomorrow afternoon an ambulance has been booked. This has now put me right on edge. I don't know what to expect now when he comes home. He will not be able to get chemotherapy or radiotherapy as they think it will not be able to work. Had a wee bit of hope there that they would bring that back in but no it's not happening. Palliative care has been put in place just sounds so real and so final now was trying to avoid that for long enough. I don't know how they are going to work this as I still have covid. They said palliative care will be coming out to see us don't know when don't really care this has just upset my day completely and I was having quite a nice day too but again see, built my hope up too much. Guess it will be back to him lying in bed again because he won't be able to get up because of his stomach so much for them working on that unless they're going to do it here. I don't know because they said to him this morning there is more they could do for him in hospital than at home which is logical because they have all the facilities there. I honestly felt a bit better today after him telling me this morning all the things they were going to do with him and now they're going to kick him out the door. Can feel the anxiety rising already.
I'm sorry you're going through this xx we're all here if/when you need to get how you're feeling off your chest. Good luck for your appointment tomorrow x
I'm so sorry this has happened. Do you have anyone in the hospital you can speak to before he's discharged so you can get some answers tonyour questions? When my dad was in hospital I would just phone the ward and they'd get someone to call me back xx
Spoke to the hospital and they have said that he will not get anymore oncology treatment. There was hope that he would get some chemotherapy or radiotherapy introduced but now it seems that that is not going to happen and we don't know now if anything else will happen in the way of treatment. I am so distraught. He mentioned something about getting tablets for cancer I don't know if this will be just to help with pain relief or something and antibiotics. He's not one for taking in information and I can't be there to find out what it happening. Just have to play it by ear now as they say.
Les has an infusion every 3weeks and tablets to take morning and night. He has today had his 3rd and now 4 tablets in morning and 4 at night. I hope he gets the tablets. This is such a sad situation for you especially since you have Covid and I must say I am surprised they are sending home with you having it. My thoughts are with you all. Love Maggie xx
Thanks Maggie! Is Les getting chemotherapy?? Jay can't get it now. The palliative care will be on board now. Just seems so final and to know I will eventually lose him. The nurse said on the phone today no more oncology treatment so that's it I take it unless miracle happens. They are sending him home with antibiotics tomorrow whatever good they will do him and some other tablets think it is for pain relief only. I am so so bitter about everything. I just want to hide under the duvet and not come out or go to sleep and not wake up. I'm just in bits. Take Care.
Dear Vicky I would be really bitter, angry etc. I am not sure how I would cope with that sort of news. Take all the help you can and rant and rave on here. I am not sure what to say to you but I do hope you have lots of support. It was his 3rd lot of chem starting yesterday and I am still in bits about it. I can only send you virtually a large hug and put on a brave face. What time is he coming home xx
Dear Vicky can I join you under the duvet as I feel exactly the same. Had a terrible night couldn’t get Kevin off the sofa and had our first cross words as I feel so tired and weary. Couldn’t manage to get him to the toilet so that’s another thing he’s embarrassed about. Eventually got him into bed and I just cried after he went to sleep. Think carers might be needed sooner than I thought. After 50 years together I can’t beat the thought of losing him xx
Torry I certainly would get carers in as you also need to be well and it sounds you need the support. I know it is awful when carers come in as they are not always the same person that arrives. Please get some help with him. This is very hard for you both and I too would be distraught at the thought of losing your loved one. I am still distraught but not at the moment in your situation. Due to lack of family and only one friend here I would turn to carers for help and support without a doubt. You both need good memories not horrible ones. Sorry if this sounds a bit blunt but you need help now. If we lived near I would help but we don’t. I got mirtazapine off the doctor and it has helped with anxiety etc. I really feel for you both. As always all in my thoughts. Take care of yourselves as well. Huge from me xx
