Hello, I am new to this group. I have been reading through some of your stories out there and it’s absolutely terrifying me that I have bowel cancer. Before I start my story I just want to say how sorry I am for those out there that are going through this and wish you all well.
I am a 30 year old woman with three young kids, my whole life I have suffered with health anxiety and 8 years ago when I had my first child this got worse. I constantly think I have something serious “C”. The last 4 years I have pushed to be checked for breast cancer and lung cancer and all have come back clear. About 6 weeks ago I found a pea size soft moveable lump near my anus, doesn’t hurt, skin colour almost like just a little skin tag. A week later after a bowel movement I noticed that when I wiped it was maroon colour, instantly I needed to examine inside the toilet to find a streak of bright red blood through my stool(which was normal colour). In these last 5 weeks, I have had various symptoms that come and go, pain in the bum(literally), itching, my stools have become softer(not diarrhoea). I have had back pain that’s come and gone, dull belly ache that’s also come and gone. I have in 5 weeks lost 9lb in weight unintentionally. I go to the toilet every morning between 6am and 7am without fail, sometimes having just a small strain to start with. I get the odd day where I may need to go again within half an hour but that’s only once weekly/fortnightly. Sometimes on these extra bowel movements the stool can change in shape and size. Sometimes, not all the time I feel like I haven’t emptied my bowel completely. Also a couple of times when wiping I have noticed the most tiniest amount of red almost like I have just marked it with a red marker pen. Every morning I wake up I have butterflies in my stomach, I don’t know if this is classed as a symptom or if it’s just nerves about what I might find after having a bowel movement.
3 weeks ago I made an appointment to see the doctor, this was after speaking to 2 previous doctors who prescribed hemorroid creams. The doctor I spokE to decided to call me in for an examination. After the examination she went to speak to her senior GP in charge, I asked her if I should be worried and if she had found something. She told me that she can’t feel lumps as such but maybe just bumps, and that between her and her senior they are sending me for a sigmoidoscopy. I asked her if she thought it was cancer and would she tell me if that’s what she thinks it is and why I am having this test. She told me that she doesn’t think it’s cancer and that she thinks its due to just hemorroids, and that she would tell me otherwise as they are very open with their patients. She also said that they are not worried at this point.
Sorry for the extremely long post, but basically i have read about sigmoidoscopys and that they are used to detect cancer not hemorroids. My anxiety is through the roof and I cannot think about anything other than this and thinking about if it has spread and if I will be here to see my babies grow up. I can feel my partner and family getting so frustrated with me because it’s all I talk about. I have good days where I don’t think about it and days where I can’t stop. Google is my worst enemy, and no matter how many times people tell me not to I still go ahead and read about it all.
again I am really Sorry for the long boring post, and I appreciate if anyone, even if just one person can read this and she’d some light or reassurance for me! I’m absolutely terrified 
thankyou xx
