Day 1 of Chemo tablets feeling anxious

Hi Merriemee2b657 and of course it’s normal to feel anxious but try to focus on the fact that you’re now cancer free and this is just the belt and braces to give you the best chance of a cancer free future.

Sometimes the reputation of chemo is worse than the actual experience and, like with any medication, they have to warn you of all the side effects. Some of the chemo posts on here will be by people having capox which is iv oxaliplatin then capecitabine in tablet form. The most part of the side effects is from the oxaliplatin and many find the capecitabine tablets alone very tolerable.

Hopefully you’ve been given a 24 hour support number? This is for support not just emergencies so please give them a ring if you’re worried about anything?

Hope it goes well

Karen x

Hi Merriemee2b657 , I’m so sorry you are going through this. As Karen said it is normal to feel anxious. I am currently going through a very similar thing. I had my surgery at the end of October and started chemo on the 10th December. Like you all the nodes were clear, but it had begun to travel into my blood and lymphatic vessels. So I have to have 8 rounds of capecitabine, and I’m currently on round three.

Are you also on Capecitabine?

My anxiety levels have improved somewhat, but still not the best. I was like you very anxious about the tablets and it got worse before it got better. I think most of my anxiety about the tablets was because I did not know what to expect, but rounds two and three have been better. I am on day 9 of round three currently, and whilst still not easy is better than round 1.

It seems strange to be taking something that you are not even allowed to touch.

I thought that the surgery and the chemo would be the hardest part of this journey, but it is the mental/emotional battle which I am finding the toughest part.

But I am finding that, living my life and not putting things off is very helpful, I know that is easier said than done, but it has helped me and may be helpful for you also. I am also seeing a therapist, which I am a big advocate of.

Speaking to someone, who does not know you, who you do not have to worry about upsetting, who can give you practical advice and tools, is really helpful.

I hope the first courtly of days have gone OK.

Kat

Hello Kat 

thank you so much for responding. I am on the same tablets and doing eight cycles I am now on day 3 of the first cycle so far only minor side effects little feeling of sickness in the morning and tingling in hands and feet but very manageable at the moment I except it’s early days. I look at the tablets each time and think why am I poisoning myself but still take them. I’ve always been a very confident and strong person but this has really knocked me down but I am now getting defiant and rebelling against these feelings which is the normal way I deal with stressors. My operation was on the 15 December last year hence the quietest Christmas ever! I am lucky that I am retired and sad that my epic retirement is now on hold. I have a wonderful network of support around me with friends who have traveled this journey. My biggest worry is that home is my safe space and I battle with myself if I have to go out,  the only other place I feel comfortable in is my local pub where all my pub friends have been so supportive but I worry about catching bugs now. I’ve always loved driving but even this is a worry to me now. I’ve not driven since before my op. And now cannot drive as I am suffering from chronic fatigue which has plagued me for 30 years but is now not as manageable as it was YET. It would be wonderful if we could keep in touch on here during our journey to share experiences highs and lows  

Hi, 

You are very welcome. I am glad you have a support network and you are still managing to make it out, even if only to the pub.

I understand the worry about catching bugs.

Keep being defiant and rebelling, until you get back to you. I am going to do the same thing. We will get there.

I am happy to stay in touch.

Try and enjoy your weekend.

Hello I am on my week off.I have done two sessions of eight and I’ve had a few side affects like diarrhoea but also constipation.These have been manageable with tablets.The last two days of my second session I started having sore feet and hands.I read online to use ice packs wrapped in a towel would help.The soreness has carried on into my rest week and I’ve started using basin with iced water to treat my feet.Hard to tell if this is helping as after 15 minutes my feet are freezing but pain is gone and quite relieved.Be very careful being around anyone with a virus or cold as I caught one from my grandson last week and ended up in hospital.They told me my immune system was very low and to careful with being around anyone with any kind of infection.As for the feet and hands I’ve ordered ice socks and gloves that have been recommended.Get them next week so will post to let forum know if they help.

Thanks Joe I will order some if I need them. All my family know not to come near me if they are ill luckily my grand children are older so the majority of interaction is via video. I do have some tingling in my feet especially in bed so keep them out of the covers but other than that no other symptoms as yet but I am sure that will change as the weeks go on. I’ve got eight days off at the end of this month which now feels like a mini holiday. Let me know if you recommend the ice socks and gloves.