Advice needed

Hello and welcome to the community, although sorry to hear about your mum. It normally takes a week to 10 days to process biopsies and scans. Under normal times, we would then have a follow up consultation within 2-3 weeks. As mum is so poorly, it would be an idea to give her consultant's secretary a ring to try and chase things up. I hope all goes well. Best wishes.

Hi Lurcherlou,It might be worth having your mum’s urine checked for infection if that hasn’t been done lately.Sometimes in older people infections can affect walking ability.Perhaps your mum would give her permission for you and your sister to discuss your concerns with her gp.There is plenty of advice and support on this board.We are all here for you and your family.love Jane xx

Hi Lurcherlou and Sister

I always preface these type of remarks with, please check with a good pharmacist, who knows all about Mum and her meds, before using nutritional supplements. That said, much of the population is zinc deficient, which can affect appetite. My instinct especially when her appetite is poor would be to give her, with any food she does have for preference, a good quality multi-vitamin/multi-mineral. Also, is she on statins? This is important.

An easy way to choose good quality is to [take a magnifying glass, you may need it] read the ingredients as distinct from what it claims to give you. If the zinc is zinc oxide it is not suitable. OK ones are zinc glutamate, zinc citrate, zinc picolinate and zinc amino acid chelate [pronouced keelate]. The reason being these are absorbed well by the gut but zinc oxide is not. You could consult a nutritionist. There are also lots of health smoothie recipes around which you could try her with. None of this will generate a dramatic improvement but will provide a long term safety net. The less she eats the more important it is that every bite is as nutrient dense as possible. You could ask the GP for Fortisip, Ensure etc to help.

If she is having very little exercise, my granny used to swear by 'bicycling in the air' lying on her back in bed. This helps at least maintain joint flexibility and I now find it useful myself. If she likes music, can you get her to sing along with you to a song or two on the radio or your phone? It's good chest exercise for heart and lungs and good for mood too.

So sorry to hear you have been left in such distressing limbo by 'the system', but you are very welcome on this forum and there is always someone here for you soon to reduce the on-your-own feeling.

Denby

Hi Lurcherlou, sounds like your mum is having a rotten time and you need support. I would echo Rily's suggestion ...Consultant's secretaries can be really helpful. Let them know how badly things are going and worried you are. You could also phone the Macmillan help line for further advice. Sending love, let us know how you get on? xxx

Hi Lurcherlou,

I’m so sorry to hear about your Mum, it must be distressing for you and your sister to see her deteriorate over the last few months. You should certainly contact the consultant’s secretary as other have said but perhaps also contact your GP to see if something else is going on with your Mum.

Best wishes Luce x

Thank you for all your kind help and advice. I will contact her gp on Monday as discuss the possibility of a urinary infection. On Thursday I will ring the consultants secretary and start pushing as that will be just over a week since her biopsy.

During the day she is quite calm but what we are also seeing is that from 6pm onwards she is hugely restless, pulls herself out of bed and moves between the bed, her armchair and the floor (?!), she then pings her bell to be helped back into bed, I tuck her in, go back to what I was doing and within minutes she is repeating this behaviour. This goes on all evening. Come nighttime I get about 2 hrs sleep when she calls for help and I find that she is doing the same thing. This goes on all night then come 7 in the morning she is back to normal.

When I ask her about it she says that she can’t stop herself - she moves more all night than she does during the day. I am knackered ! I will ask the gp about this as well - add it to the list. Does anyone else have any experience of this behaviour in the elderly?

Hi . If I were you I would not wait until tomorrow. It might be wise to call NHS 111 for advice. We are not medics here, but if she does have an infection, it would need to be treated. Keep us posted. Best wishes.

I agree with rily,phone 111 and hopefully they can send someone out to check your mum.Explain about her walking as they tend to take this a bit more seriously.I care for my mother and when she had delirium she became more confused and restless at night.This was caused by infection.Let us know how things go.I know how exhausting it is.love Jane xx

Yes definitely contact 111. If it is an infection the sooner it is treated the better. X

I too would be calling111. Also does her behaviour by any chance stem from restless legs or cramp, if she is able to express this at all? If so magnesium spray rubbed into the skin can provide quick relief and, as always check with the pharmacist, magnesium supplements could help. Magnesium citrate is better than cheaper versions [tho not very expensive]. As I have to be on calcium supplements I would not get a good night's sleep without these to balance the calcium.

With sincere wishes you can get the right help for all of you. Keep a snuggly blanket by the sofa so you can catch a nap to help you keep going.

Denby