New to this experience

Hi Sue,

Im the same. I dont think there's a right or wrong way to handle it. Its too consuming to give yourself a break from. You might find talking to people on here helps, they have lots of experiences to share. 

Hi . Welcome to the group. I am sure you will get lots of support here from those of us who know what you are going through. The early days of uncertainty can be anxious times. The diagnosis of any cancer puts our minds in a whirl and we always think the worst. Be aware that bladder cancer can be treated effectively and there are many here to tell the tale. Once you get a treatment plan in place, things tend to get slightly better as you know something positive is happening. It's good to have support from your family, but some inner feelings you like to keep to yourself. That's where this place comes in handy. You can share your feelings here an ask questions to people who understand. If you feel like telling us where you are up to at the moment, and how you were diagnosed, we can help you through this. Any questions, or if you just want to talk, hit the reply button below. Best wishes.

Hello Sue

Until you get the detail of the diagnosis and a treatment plan, I recommend that you focus on doing the things you enjoy most and stay away from Dr Google where there is a great deal of misinformation.

It's ok to feel scared, angry, withdrawn, we've all been there, cancer messes with your head and can take a while to get used to the idea that life is going to change a bit.

This is just the place to seek information, one of us will have the answer, or to let off steam.

As Rily says, this version of this beastly disease is very treatable and there are thousands of us who, after treatment, live full lives again, sometimes a bit modified.

CB

Well said Rily. As usual solid, helpful and reassuring advice

Garviv

Hi Sue and welcome to the group. All that the others have said is good. I will add [me being the patient's wife, but he has Asperger's and doesn't react emotionally the way most people do], try to be kind to yourself. There's no need to worry about falling apart in private, it's natural. However, if you can spend even a few minutes outdoors especially when feeling stressed, it is a great calmer to most people. Watching the tadpoles feed totally clears my head until I go back inside. Maybe feed the ducks somewhere?

I also disappear into an absorbing thriller, space-fi or biography from time to time. You may be a knitter, box-set watcher or baker. Whatever it is, allow yourself that mental down-time.

With kind thoughts, 

Denby

Hey Sue

We know exactly how it is for you, we go out there & put on the performance of a life time, but what goes on inside our head's a totally different matter.  

We're all with you here. every step of the way we'll be beside you xxx

Thank you for the life line when I’m drowning. Wham at the beginning of lock down I had a water infection they could see blood but I couldn’t. The another infection which also went with medication. I got a call from a hospital specialist regarding my water infection. I said it had been cured, the specialist said yes, but you still have blood in your water. I went for a scan which showed nothing. To be on the safe side  last Wednesday I went for a camera investigation which showed a cluster of hanging egg type shapes. My specialist said he thought it was an average size cancerous growth which will be removed by surgery. That was it I fell down the rabbit hole, hearing only the word over and over. My Father passed away in 1962 of bladder cancer and I can remember it clearly.  I haven’t been able to think about anything else since. To take the fear out of the word Cancer I have renamed it Clara.

Hi Sue, the surgery to remove bladder cancer growths is much less frightening than you might imagine. Sometimes you can go home the same day if you have someone to collect you and stay with you overnight since you will have an anaesthetic. Everyone's experience of TURBTs (shaving away the tumours) is different but in general mine have been painless and no troubles afterwards. it generally takes a couple of weeks to get your results and they will discuss what treatment is best for you. It's terrifying to get a cancer diagnosis but there are so many treatments available for bladder cancer these days.Things have changed a lot since the early sixties. Best wishes x

Hi sue I was much the same as you had recurrent water infections lots of different antibiotics to try and cure them then sent for investigations just thinking I was just having a ultrasound scan then had the camera only to be told it was cancer I couldn’t take it in then everything happened like a rollercoaster ct scan mri scan then turbt only to end up with radical cystectomy all in 3 months over Christmas it’s now 5 months on and I am getting used to a new sort of me . The thing is I am still here as many others on this site will tell you treatment is very good now for this cancer so please try not to worry take care love Liz x

Mr W was diagnosed  in May 2016 and it felt like the world had ended Here we are 4 years on 2 Turbts 24 bcg treatments and  numerous flexi checks he is all clear Bcg completed and surveillance  from now on Next check next month maybe depends and yes I will be suffering anxiety once we have the date Mr W is always more optimistic If anyone had told me 4 years ago we would be where we are today I simply would not have believed it 

It's a bumpy road but there is life after bc as those on this site can all attest 

Sending love 

Wilbert  xx