Hand hold ( operation date finally come around )

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Hi bit of. A regular poster , my dad was diagnosed with muscle invasive bladder cancer end of July , grade 3 .. After a wait of nearly 6 weeks his operation to remove his bladder prostate & lymph nodes has come around ( been such a hard few weeks ) He’s being admitted tomorrow lunch time then operation Monday 8am. I think I’m more nervous than him he’s a very laid back person , he’s been amazing , scared to see him so unwell after the operation As he is actually doing so well considering he’s actually obviously very unwell - still exercising walking still looks the same etc . They’ve said Monday to keep busy not to ring to check & his consultant will ring me when he’s in recovery ( I know Monday will be a tough day ) this is what we been waiting for though but god it feels scary when it’s reality and it’s actually here ….

  • Hi Owen777

    I think it's as hard for family members as for the patient to be honest. I was in hospital yesterday and I think my lovely Hubby suffered more than I did. At least I had the Nursing staff doing all their checks with me then the Surgeon coming to talk to me, then the Anaesthetist coming for a chat and other patients to talk to etc.

    I believe the way to think about it is that after Monday your Dad will be free of his cancer, all being removed during the surgery and that he will get better and better from that point on and be able to get on and enjoy his life with you. Dad will be in the best of hands and this group will be here to hold your hand every step of the way.

    Sending hugs and positivity to you and your Dad. 

    Love Ade xx

  • Hi Owen777,

    Best of luck for your father tomorrow. Sound's like he has great support, which will no doubt help with his recovery.

    Keep us posted.

    Trevor 

  • Hi Owen777,I hope it all goes well for your dad.Best wishes.Love Jane xx

  • Hello Owen777, we will all be with you on Monday as you wait for news of your dad’s operation. Garviv 

  • Hi Owen777, it is very hard to watch someone you love go through a big operation. We see this surgery from a vulnerable patients point of view, but to the staff , although major surgery , its something they are experts in. They will look after him well and he will soon start the road to recovery. I find the helpless feeling really difficult, I want to do something to make everything better. You are doing that Owen777 just by being there and caring so much. Wishing your dad and you all the best for tomorrow. keep in touch with the group, hope we can help steady you through this tough time. 

    Much love Angela x

  • Hope all goes well and a speedy recovery from the operation on Monday. Sending love and positivity to you all. 

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  • Hi Owen, I had muscle invasive bladder cancer 2 years ago, had the bladder out and am now managing fine with a stoma. I'm 71. It's harder to be in your position, my husband got so worked up he made himself ill. My tip is, as far as  you can manage it, keep as calm as you can, trust the surgeons - they do it all the time and although the patient will look worryingly frail, fastened up to drips, monitors etc, it's all a process of improving. Don't spend too long in the ICU on the first or second day, there will be other patients in there having strange symptoms and your father will probably not be aware of much at all. I'd say 5 minute visits are enough. Once he's back on the ward he'll be able to talk more and things will be calmer.

    Good luck to both of you.

    Late start

  • Hi Owen777 

    I've been thinking about you and your Dad today and hoping that the surgery went well.

    Sending hugs and positive vibes Sparkles️ 

    Love Ade xx

  • Hi everyone , dads operation is done.   He went down to theatre at ten and it took.  3 and half hours . Consultant said he was pleased with way it all went.  Dads on high dependancy tonight but he sounds in really good spirits & the nurses said he’s doing really well sitting up chatting having cup Of tea . He said he don’t feel hungry at all just very thirsty . I will definitely sleep better tonight praying this is the start of new beginnings . Thank you for all the support it helps so much x

  • Hi everyone , dads operation is done.   He went down to theatre at ten and it took.  3 and half hours . Consultant said he was pleased with way it all went.  Dads on high dependancy tonight but he sounds in really good spirits & the nurses said he’s doing really well sitting up chatting having cup Of tea . He said he don’t feel hungry at all just very thirsty . I will definitely sleep better tonight praying this is the start of new beginnings . Thank you for all the support it helps so much x