AIN 3 / Anal cancer

Hello love have messaged you xxx

I had my second PET scan since treatment which was negative for recurrence, meaning cancer free for past 7 months. Then my oncologist said I needed a CT scan in 3 months and added he was looking for distant Mets. It upset me because I hadn’t even thought about “distant Mets”. I feel like now I have something worse to worry about. 
I don’t think you ever get over a cancer diagnosis, it’s always in the back of your mind. I realize my oncologist wasn’t trying to scare me, but he did. He said I could have my Port-A-Cath removed if the next CT is negative. 
I can live with all the changes to my body due to radiation, but sometimes I wish this would be over, like a bad dream.