Mum’s terminal anal cancer

Hello suzzie 

I am really sorry to hear that your Mum is so uncomfortable.  I am aware of several options to relieve the lymphodema by applying massage and then pressure to the affected area.  And I would think that some sort of specialist cushion would help her sitting but this both these measures should be done by the team treating her, they would/should know which avenues are best to help your Mum.  In view of your Mum's diagnosis and discomfort I am really surprised that her team aren't being more proactive in helping her.  I am full of admiration that she is still getting out and about and it makes me wonder if she is putting on a stiff upper lip and not complaining when she has a hospital appointment.  My parents were exactly the same!

I think the best path would be to call the hospital and tell them exactly what is going on and ask outright what can be done to relieve these symptoms, and not to be brushed off.  Do you think she would be able to do that?  Or maybe you, she might really need someone else to advocate for her.

I am sorry if what I have said isn't particularly helpful but when I investigated, the side effects she is going through need specialist bandages and dressings and the cushion I was going to suggest (a donut one) isn't advised as the edges can affect the blood supply.

I hope you get some more replies that help, but in the meantime, please chase the hospital!

Big hug to you both

Irene xx 

Thanks for replying, she has had a support bandage from the Lymphodema clinic, but she finds it very uncomfortable at the top of her leg! I feel we don’t get much support from the oncologist team sce they decided palliative chemotherapy would be too much for her! I will give them a ring to see what support there is out there as I’m finding it difficult to know what to do to help her  xxx