Update and awaiting results

Hi Ker25 nice to hear back from you and great that you are able to return to your job which you so much enjoy. It probably can have a kind of  normalising effect and distraction from being at home which sometimes can produce negative thoughts. I also have experienced long waiting times for scan results which is the worst worrying feeling ever. Every time I am due to go to my hospital I get the jitters. Even a few days before my husband says I am moody and he knows it’s because I’m getting anxious. I’m coming up three years post treatment and it still bothers me. I have told my oncologist how waiting times for results are so distressing and she is very apologetic but the usual mantra is how they are under pressure in the NHS. 

Your question got me thinking, what are my hopes and what would I like to gain? I would like to get up in the morning naturally without my bowels waking me up with its persistent pressure preventing me from having a nice lay in. I also would like to be able to just go for days out without having to plan my diet the day before and not want to know where there is a toilet in every vicinity. I am in a group with a local cancer charity and they do social things and none of them have had anal cancer (only a couple know I have but they don’t know anything about the treatment etc) and it just seems that their treatment side effects do not have the same impact. I hope a time comes where this is a distant memory and I can have normal bowels again. It will be interesting to hear others hopes and where they want to be.

i wish you a good result 

Julie

Hello Ker25

I hear you, I really do.  I also get completely wound up around scan times, sometimes I wish I never had to see the inside of a hospital again and then I think but what if there is something going on?  Your psychologist sounds very understanding about the impact that a cancer diagnosis gives, and yes, I understand wishing it was all a dream - or rather a bad nightmare.

Six weeks is a very long wait, quite extraordinary, really, I don't know why some hospitals can't invest in clearing the backlog and give results within a week, the mental toll on patients is immense.

I am so happy to hear that in the main things are good, but I would see the psychologist as long as it is possible; I think the mental side is sadly overlooked in many cases and therapy can go a long way to healing some of the scars.

I really do wish you NED - I will be thinking of you every step of the way.

Irene xx

Ker! How nice to see you here again!

I'm right there with you. Got my scan a couple of weeks ago, and see the oncologist to get the results in a few days. I'm anxious about that, but way way way more anxious about the anoscopy in just 2 more days. Like, lie awake at night jittering about it.

I really should see a counselor. I never have, so it feels weird, but my fears just skyrocket every time I need another physical exam. I'm getting stabs of pain right in the bullseye just sitting here typing about it.

Looking forward to hearing good news from you!

Hugs

Suz