Just a fancy way of saying that my intestines are still inflamed and act up whenever anything they don't like comes their way. I haven't visited the forum in some months. Just trying to deal with life and the whole pandemic thing has taken a bit of energy. I'm now 15 months post treatment. I can honestly say that my general health has improved. I found out in March of 2020 that the tumor/cancer is gone. That's the good news. The hard part now seems to be living with the damage done to my intestinal tract. I've done quite a bit of research on my own and it seems that radiation treatment to that area can cause longterm damage to the lining of the intestines and result in chronic intestinal enteritis. What this means for me is having to always be within a dash of a bathroom. Living with unpredictability. And living with occasional bouts of diarrhea. I've learned over the past months that food will often trigger a negative response. I've given the negative responses cute nicknames like "drain cleaner day" or "volcano day." The difference being is whether I actually make it to the toilet in time. Fortunately "volcano days" are now few and far between and those are definitely food related. However the other annoying type of diarrhea, "drain cleaner" means I sit there until my intestines just empty themselves out. I mean completely. I'll have one of these about once a week or so. Most of the time I'm pretty sure it is food related but other times I have no idea why - it's like the radiation is still doing something.
I've been up and down emotionally through this. I get depressed because I have to always be near a dedicated bathroom - heaven help anyone in my way should I need to get in there! Other times I'm not depressed and grateful that I no longer have cancer. And very grateful that antidiarrheal medication is available without a prescription! However, cancer and cancer treatment changed me. Changed my body and changed how I live my daily life.
I have figured out that food plays a significant role in my wellbeing. I've had to say "good-bye" to all citrus, this even includes fruit like mango. In fact I can't eat most fruit at all. I can do a quarter of an apple at a time [peeled], some banana a day and some avocado. The only fresh vegetables I can do with confidence [in moderation] are carrots, celery and lettuce. I can do a very small amount of cooked peas and corn. Seems I can do potatoes just fine. No beans of any kind. I just tried adding nuts back into my diet and now, after this week, they are out again. Maybe for good. Have to be very careful with fiber, greasy things...oh well, I won't bore you with the rest. I have been keeping a food list. I just miss what I can no longer have. I'm resentful about having to live with this ongoing challenge. But philosophically, maybe it is the price I have to pay for continued 'life.' It just alters the way I saw the rest of my life going. I know there are others who have gone through this who don't suffer long-lasting, on-going bathroom issues, and I'm happy for them. I can no longer remember what it is like to be spontaneous. If my husband and I want to make the short drive to my daughter's house for a visit I have to judge whether my "guts" are trustworthy enough to make the trip. She has 3 bathrooms in her home which takes some of the emotional pressure off. But golly, gee whiz! Why did I have to get stupid anal cancer and its brutal [for me] treatment anyway! Sigh.
